Dear Mama,

I'm tired, confused, and weak. I am closest to the edge than I have ever been, Mama. I am not sure how much longer I can still hold on. Everything seems to be falling apart, Mama.

Until when?

Dear Mama,

How are you doing? I hope you're okay. Sorry for not writing as much as I did. I really do not want to bother you because I understand you should be resting.

It's October 10 today, Monday. I'm at home while writing this letter because we have no work today. It's the Monday after La Naval Fiesta. Edgar is at work, Angel is sleeping, and Ralph did not go home for the weekend. So practically, I am alone now at home since Angel is still asleep. Except of course for dogs, Fluffy, Venz, and Chuchi who are keeping me company.

As you can see probably, I really do not know what to say. I'm just trying to reach out, because I don't have anyone to talk to. I mean, really talk to.

Work, kids, health, and just about everything. I am consumed by all these things inside me, Mama.

I'm sorry. I'll just stop now. I don't think I should bother you with this.

Take care, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Paranoia

Dear Mama,

Last Saturday I had my annual physical examination as required by our company. I really don't like to, but as I mentioned, it is required. With my age and all the things I have been feeling lately, I knew I wouldn't be getting encouraging results.

The lab tests results aren't really out yet. I will get them within this week, probably.

The one thing that got me worried, Mama was by blood pressure. I know I have been getting BPs higher than normal before, but last Saturday my BP registered at 140/100. When the doctor saw this, she said I should be taking maintenance. I just told her I will be seeing my doctor when I get my test results.

Actually, before she said I should take maintenance, she said I should see you an Internist because my BP was something that should be a cause for alarm.

I am not worried should I get worse, Mama. After all, the kids are all graduated and working now. I am just concern because I wouldn't like to be a burden to them. I just wish that if things happen, they would be just swift so I can be with you the soonest.

I will be ending my letter right now, Mama. Sorry, if I stopped abruptly. I just felt I will be writing some dramas again if I continue. I don't want to go through that again.

I miss you, Mama. I hope to see you soon.

Take care.

I love you.


Daddy

Just an update

Dear Mama,

Hi. How are you, Mama? It's been a while, I know. I really don't want to bother you as much, because you should be really resting now. But you know how I often I would like to reach out to you. If only I can you pull you back here, Mama. Especially now that the kids are all grown up and all finished with their schooling. We can take care of you better now, Mama. 

I'm sorry. I know it's all too late now. 

I just would like to update you, Mama. I know you have been watching us, but I still want to tell you like how I used to tell you everything then.

Angel already has a job now, Mama. Unfortunately, it's not related to her course, but she took it and she said so that she will already earn. Anyway, she can always look for another job that will enable her to use what she learned in college, which is IT. Although, I really doubt that, Mama. It looks like she is enjoying her job and she isn't really keen in looking for another job right now.

Ralph is still in Ortigas, while Edgar is still working in the hospital. It's quite a challenge now to have them all together during weekends. Usually Edgar have work on weekends, sometimes Ralph have trainings, and Angel sometimes have an event in their company. We still do find time to go out together, Mama. We just can't do it as often as we used to.

Sometimes, I still wish you were still with us, Mama. Especially now. You would have been very proud and happy. The kids would have been very happy. I would have been very happy!

I'm sorry, Mama. I just can't help it.

I should end my letter right now, Mama. Lest, I might get carried away again.

I miss you, Mama.

I love you.

Daddy

Promise fulfilled

Dear Mama,

Tomorrow, May 7, our baby Angel will be graduating from college. It's one day before my 51st birthday, Mama, so that makes it a great birthday gift for me!

With Angel graduating, that makes all our three kids finished and all with bachelor's degree! I am glad I was able to make it through, Mama. Of course, I knew you were guiding us along the way, and you were interceding for us especially when I almost do not know what to do and wanted to give up. Thank you very much, Mama.

Although they are all graduates now, I know my work is not yet done. I will still be here for them, Mama as long as they need me. And I know they still do.

But I'm really happy, Mama. I'm happy that we were able to reach this far. If only you were still here, it would have been a great moment for all of us. I just wish it could be.

I hope you are looking down from heaven right now, Mama... smiling and proud.

This is all for you, Mama.

I love you.

I miss you.

Daddy