Just another letter...

Dear Mama,

I really wouldn't like to write another letter of whining. You should be resting, Mama. I understand that. That is why, sometimes I don't write you... because I don't want to cry in my letters anymore.

But I just don't have anyone here beside me. You knew I tried to look, Mama. I told you that, but they just wouldn't accept me! It was only you who really saw through me, Mama... only you.

I miss you, Mama. I wish I can be with you soon.

I love you.


Daddy

I need you

I could really use your hug right now, Mama... I miss you...

Edgar's JS Prom tonight

Dear Mama,

Our son, Edgar Allan, is on his JS Prom tonight. Although I wonder if he is still there now since it's already 12:02 a.m. He said he won't be coming home and they would all proceed to their classmate's house and stay there overnight. I hope he'll be fine, Mama... and I really hope he enjoyed his prom night.

As for me, still working on the book and the talk that I need to deliver in iBlog7, Mama. I really painted myself to the corner this time. I hope I would be able to finish the manuscript, and at the same time work for online income in my blogs, and deliver the talk about writer's block with flying colors. I wish.

Anyway, I'm really sleepy now. I was just waiting for Edgar to text me, but until now he hasn't sent any message. I have been restraining myself to text him because I don't want him being disturbed and feel that I was breathing behind his shoulders. I really hoped he enjoyed the night.

Well, take care of yourself, Mama. I really miss you... I love you, Mama.


Daddy

It happened again, Mama

Dear Mama,

I'm really sorry for what happened to your grave. I really wish there's something I can do to protect it, Mama. I hope those people who did that would die, and that they would do the same thing to their grave. They are not human, Mama.

I'm really sorry...

Daddy

It's that day again...

Dear Mama,

It's February 14 once again. Valentine's Day, but it was also the day that you "went home" and left us. I still don't know what to make of this day, Mama. I couldn't even greet you on this day. I don't know what or how to greet you, Mama.

Well, the kids went out last night, not really to celebrate, but just to have some time together. Because it was the eve of Valentine's Day, I'd like to think that we were having a Valentine celebration. Because, soon they'll be big enough and I might not even be able to prod them and go out with me.

I'm sure you already know, like what I said in my previous letter, I sent out flowers for this day, Mama. I hope you will not get mad. Although, I'm still not sure whether it was a good or bad decision, I'll know when the girl receives the flower. Anyway, I really hope you understand, Mama. No one can still take your place. I assure you that.

Angel will be dancing in school in a few hours. I need to go to sleep now, Mama. My eyes are already closing. Will write about Angel's dance later. Take care of yourself, Mama. I miss you.

I love you, Mama.


Daddy

Trying...

Dear Mama,

I'm trying to get back on track. I'm rather slow, but I'm trying Mama. I really wish I am not alone.

I miss you, Mama.

Take care.

I love you.


Daddy

Day 4 and a silly question

Dear Mama,

It's day 4 without a job. While I'm enjoying the rest and stress-free day I'm having, at the back of my mind I know I still need to get hired soon. So far, I have only applied for 2 positions, in the same company. I haven't received any feedback from them yet. I hope I can find a job that is not accounting-related, Mama.

If I would have my way, I would love not to work and just concentrate on writing. But Edgar and Angel are graduating, and next year I'll have two sons in college and Angel will be in high school. It's unfortunate that Angel did not pass the entrance exam at SSC, so I'll be enrolling her in a private school to ensure her a quality education. That means I have to work hard. Hopefully, I would earn enough for them.

I really have a silly question, Mama and I do not even know how to ask it. It's February, and Valentine's day is approaching. I know it's your anniversary, it was the day you "went home" but, would you be angry, upset, or feel violated if I sent out flowers to another girl on that day? I still don't know if I'll do that, since I vowed not to desecrate your memory.

I'm sorry, Mama. I know I don't even have to ask about it. The fact that I even gave it thought feels like I have already desecrated your memory. I don't know. I can't understand what's happening to me. I'm sorry, Mama. I'm really sorry.

Please take care of yourself. I really wish I could be with you soon so that I won't even entertain these thoughts. I'm sorry... I guess, I'm just missing you...

I love you, Mama.


Daddy