Why am I a failure, Mama?

Dear Mama,

    Why am I such a failure? Why am I a such a big loser, Mama? I am failing in almost everything!

    I failed as a son, I wasn't able to make my parents proud and was not even able to help them financially. In fact, I was even a burden to them even though I was already married and have my own family. They were still supporting me when I lost my job and you were sick, Mama. I did not help them. I burdened them.

    I was a failure as a student. Did not get any honors that might have made Nanay and Tatay proud. I even almost failed in one of my subjects. I barely made it, Mama. 

    I failed as an accountant, a banker, and an employee. I wasn't able to achieve anything. I was not able to make something of my profession. I cannot do anything right, Mama.

    I failed as a Toastmaster. I never became a champion. I failed as an author. Nobody bought my books. I failed as a songwriter. My songs never amounted to anything.

    But most of all, Mama, I failed as a father. I was not able to give our children a decent house they can live in. A safe and peaceful environment they can thrive in. I was not able to provide all their needs, and I was not able to guide them in my life properly because I myself am clueless. I'm such a big failure, Mama. A loser!

    I'm sorry, Mama. I failed.

                                                                                                             Daddy

The rain never stopped

Dear Mama,

    It has been raining continuously since last night. It would pause for a while, and then it would rain again even harder. Typhoon Crising has already left the country and this is just monsoon rain, Mama. Although there is another one coming in, if it's not yet here.

    Ralph has already left for work, Mama. I'm waiting for his message that he has boarded their shuttle bus. He took a trike to the terminal even though it's raining. I hope he'll make it on time and dry. It's already 8:19 p.m. and their shuttle leaves at 8:30 p.m.

    There's loud thunder, Mama. Perhaps there might be some lightning, too although they must be far because I can't hear them. 

    I guess that will be for now, Mama.

    I hope to be with you soon.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Another rainy weekend

Dear Mama,

    It will be another rainy weekend for us most probably, as there's a tropical storm. There's no typhoon signal raised yet for our place, but there's been a lot of raining lately, especially in the evening.

    It's Friday, 6:50 p.m. but Ralph has already left for work, Mama. He said he will be meeting his friends at the mall before going to his office later before 9:00 p.m.

    I don't know what to say here, Mama. But I know I wanted to say something. There's a lot inside of me right now, but I don't how to say it. I just wish I can hug right now, Mama.

    I need you.

    

                                                                                                            Daddy

Rainy Sunday

Dear Mama,

    It's a rainy Sunday morning. It's 8 a.m. and I am done with the laundry, Mama. I had my coffee earlier. Ralph and Angel are sleeping right now. Edgar is already awake, but he is in his room. I think he'll be preparing our brunch in a while, Mama. He already put the left-over rice from the freezer to the table.

    It has been raining almost the whole week, Mama. There were days the sun would shine for the day, although it was still cloudy, and then rain would fall in the evening and overnight. I'm not sure, but there must be a typhoon right now, Mama.

    Yesterday, our siblings had lunch out with Nanay, courtesy of Koya Boy who will be going back to Guam today, Mama. His flight will be this evening.

    Ralph will be having his turn-over for his house anytime soon, Mama. He already paid for the requirements to move in, they are just doing the finishing touches. He is not yet sure, but he is planning to move in to his new house, although he will then be farther from his work.

    I guess that will be all for now, Mama.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Life update

Dear Mama,

    It's the last day of June, the first half of the year flew by so quickly. We're now entering the second half and in only a few more months, it will be Christmas again. I still don't like Christmas, Mama. But of course, I don't have to be a Grinch.

    Ralph is preparing to go to work, Mama. We already had our dinner. I'm done cleaning the cat litter boxes, Angel fed the cats, and Edgar is now washing the dishes. It's a quiet rainy evening, Mama. Although it's just drizzles now. I hope Ralph will be able to leave early.

    Angel will be going back to the doctor on Wednesday, Mama. So far, her tests were all clear. Just one more test, I hope it will be good also. It's a test for her bone marrow, Mama. She had it last week. She'll get the result on Wednesday and then proceed to her doctor in AUFMC.

    I submitted 2 songs to the Bini Verse and Chorus, Mama. Today is their deadline. I submitted my second song last week, and the first one the week before that. I was supposed to submit only one, Mama. But I tried writing another one last week, and thought it might have a chance when I finished it. I'm not expecting anything, Mama. Anyway, I can still use those songs if they did not make the grade.

    I guess that will be all for now, Mama. Wish I can be with you soon.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Another bout with the flu

Dear Mama,

    I had another bout with the flu. Last night was painful, Mama. I was crying in pain, I felt cold and it was painful. I didn't know what to do. I did not understand. I did not know if I was crying in pain, or because of nervousness, or because of self-pity. I did not even remember how I fell asleep.

    I did not report for work today. I sent a text message to our manager to say I have fever. I feel better now, Mama. I took medicines 'round the clock. So, I'll be able to go back to work tomorrow.

    An update on Angel's condition, Mama. Her lab results are all out - ultrasound, blood chemistry, and stool exam, they were all normal. Although she still has to go back to her doctor to bring the lab results for proper reading and diagnosis, Mama. She was prescribed antibiotics before her lab tests. I guess she'll just have to continue them. 

    I guess that will be my update for now. I wish I can hug you right now. I surely need it.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                              Daddy

Father's Day and update on Angel

Dear Mama,

    Yesterday, our children and I celebrated Father's Day. We initially went out to play bowling but there was no available lanes. So, we had coffee first while thinking of our alternative plans.

    Finally, we decided to go to the KTV instead since there was still no available lanes when we went back to check. We had fun at the KTV, Mama. Especially Angel, who has been mentioning of wanting to go to KTV for a while now. We stayed at the KTV, and sang our hearts out for 3 hours, Mama. Wish you were with us. I know you love singing.

    Another update on Angel, Mama. She was complaining of pain in her abdomen/stomach area. We were thinking of taking her to the hospital, but she doesn't want to. I was actually hesitant, because all they would do at the ER is conduct tests, without any final diagnosis, even perhaps advising confinement.

    She took pain reliever Sunday morning, Mama and she felt better. That's why we were able to go out last night. Today, she will be going to her doctor, so she can have her proper consultation. Hopefully her doctor is available. Please help her, Mama.

    I wasn't able to get her health insurance, yet. But I will be soon because I will be receiving the salary loan I applied to, to pay for her health insurance.

    Sorry for my shortcomings and failures on our children, Mama. I'm trying my best.

                                                                                                    Daddy

I picked up my lab results

Dear Mama,

    I picked up my lab results earlier, although I did not immediately look at them. I looked at them only about 30 minutes after I got home. I was afraid to see them, Mama. I was even planning just to hand them to the doctor on my check up without looking at them.

    As I slowly looked at the lab results, I felt relieved when they are still within the ideal range, Mama. However, a lot of them are borderline. Especially my blood sugar :( 

    I will just wait for the doctor's verdict when I see him next week, Mama.

    I guess I'm really getting old. The 'bonuses' are coming. I hope I will die a quick death so I won't be a burden to our children, Mama.

    Anyway, that will be for now, Mama. Can't wait to be with you soon.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

It's quarterly check up again

Dear Mama,

    It's 5:25 p.m., just finished with the laundry and done folding the clothes I washed yesterday. Although I only folded a few clothes, Mama. Most of them are not yet dry because it's already rainy season. Edgar is already preparing our dinner.

    It's quarterly check up again, Mama. I had my blood extracted for the lab test yesterday. I did not yet get the result. Actually, I'm afraid to get the results. I'm always afraid to see the results, Mama. But I'm even more afraid now. Because I am feeling a lot in my body lately. I don't know if they real or just paranoia. I will have my visit to my doctor next week. I'll bring the results then, Mama. 

    I don't know what to say. Lately I just feel... tired. I wish you were here, Mama.

    I need you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

June update

Dear Mama,

    Sorry, I wasn't able to write again for a while. It's already June and rainy season has started early this year, Mama. Good thing for Angel, it's not as hot as it used to be, although it's still hot when it's not raining.

    We just had our dinner and Ralph is getting ready for work, Mama.

    I'm back again in singing my compositions in front of public, Mama. The last one was last Sunday, June 1st, and the next one will be on July 12. My voice still cracks, Mama. I still get nervous. I'm just trying to hide it with my jokes. Wish I was really good so I can make it into another source of income. Wishful thinking, I know.

    There's another songwriting contest, Mama. This time by the popular group Bini. I am thinking of joining, Mama. I hope I can come up with a good song. This might be my chance. Not really expecting anything, but if I did not try I already failed.

    I guess that will all for now, Mama. I wish I can be with you soon.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                               Daddy

Angel's dilemma

Dear Mama,

    It's Friday, and Ralph just left for work. It's already 8:23 p.m. now, hope he'll be able to catch his shuttle bus to office. I'm waiting for his message, Mama.

    Angel's skin condition is worsening, Mama. It's because of the extreme heat we're having now. She was crying earlier because of pain and irritation, I did not know what to do. Good thing she calmed down when we were having our dinner. She's lying in Ralph's room now. There's more air there, that's why she's staying there for now.

    Just got a message from Ralph, Mama. At first I thought he was stuck in traffic, but his second message said he is already in the bus. Good thing he won't be late. 

    Please help me find the solution to Angel's condition, Mama. It's taking its toll on her health, and also her self-esteem. I don't know what to do, Mama. I'm sorry. If only you were here, this won't happen to her.

    I'm really sorry, Mama.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Happy anniversary, Mama!

Dear Mama,

    Happy anniversary!

    It's May 19, the day you said yes to be my girlfriend, although you were hesitant. Thank you for giving a chance, Mama. 

    It's also the day I fulfilled my promise of taking you to Manila Bay, Mama. I wish we could do it again.

    Happy anniversary, Mama!

    I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                            Daddy

Another encounter with thieves

Dear Mama,

    Our water meter was stolen this morning. We were surprised when Ralph messaged us to say that it was stolen, Mama. At first, he said there's no water. He thought it was just another bad service from Primewater, but probably when he went out to buy something he saw that the water meter was already gone, and there was water overflowing in front of our house.

    When Edgar and I left for work at around 6 a.m., it was still there. Also, when Ralph arrived at around 7 a.m., he just discovered it around 9:30 a.m. He went to the barangay to report it, and then went to the police for the police report because it was required by primewater. After that, he went to the office of the water district. He hasn't slept yet, by the way, because he came from duty. Angel he said he was about to sleep when he discovered what happened.

    He was finished at around 1 p.m., unfortunately, they will go tomorrow to investigate. So, we'll have to wait until tomorrow before it get fixed.

    I'm worried, Mama. It happened once, it can happen again.

    I'm tired.

                                                                                                            Daddy

Happy Mother's Day, Mama!

Dear Mama,

    Happy Mother's Day!

    It's Mother's Day today, our children and I went out to celebrate, and also to escape the summer heat because it was so hot at home. As usual, we went to SM Clark, Mama. As expected, there were a lot of people.

    We had halo-halo as soon as we arrived at the mall, Mama. And then, we just walked around the mall. But Ralph's gout wanted to join the celebration. We had to find a place to sit down because he was having difficulty walking. We had our dinner at around 5 p.m. All courtesy of Ralph, Mama.

    After  dinner, we had coffee at Tim Horton's. We stayed there until almost 8 p.m. and then we went straight home. That's just how we celebrated, Mama. Food, a little walk, food again, and coffee.

    I am missing you more in celebrations like this, Mama. I wish you were still here. 

    I miss you, Mama. Happy Mother's Day!

    I love you.

                                                                                                            Daddy

My birthday celebration

Dear Mama,

    Our children and I went out today to celebrate my 57th birthday. We had an early dinner at a buffet restaurant, Mama. We went there because they have sashimi, and Ralph loves sashimi. It was his treat anyway, so we might as well go where he can get what he likes. There weren't much buffet restaurant that serves sashimi here, Mama.

    We went there at 5 p.m., Ralph, Angel, and I, while Edgar went there straight from his work. We just arrived about 3 minutes ahead of him, Mama. They also gave me a gift, Mama. Two (2) ball caps, light blue and pink, both embroidered with roy2dworld at the back. 

    After our dinner, we went to SM Clark, Mama. Just to while away our time, because I really did not feel like going home, yet. Before 8 p.m., Ralph proceeded to their shuttle bus located just near the mall, Mama. Edgar, Angel, and I stayed for a while, and then we went home at around 8:30 p.m.

    That's how we celebrated my birthday, Mama. It would have been happier if you were with us. I miss you more when there's celebration like this, Mama. Wish you were still here.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                    Daddy

57 soon

Dear Mama,

    I'll be turning 57 in less than 48 hours. I did not really want to go out to celebrate or anything, Mama, but Ralph said we will be going to a buffet restaurant. I was reluctant because he had to work afterwards, but he insisted. I'm still trying to convince him not to proceed. We can do it on weekend anyway. 

    Remember what I said in my previous letter about the grill house beside us? I said they were not loud, right? I spoke too soon, Mama. Last night, they were loud. Not as loud as the previous owners, but we can hear them. That means they are already raising their volume, Mama. I'm starting to feel anxiety attacks again every night. I wish this will end soon. We only want a quiet and peaceful night, Mama.

    Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. Edgar will be preparing our dinner soon.

    I hope you will visit me on my birthday, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you.

                                                                                                            Daddy

First of May

Dear Mama,

    Today is May 1st, and it's a holiday - it's Labor Day. Although I had work today, Mama. We moved our holiday for next Monday to coincide with the Labor Day in Australia. Ralph and Edgar did not work, and I met them together with Angel in SM after I got out from work.

    As usual, we just spent some time walking around the mall. Then Ralph had a haircut, afterwards we had our dinner at a buffet restaurant. Of course, courtesy of Ralph, Mama. Good thing they had a birthday promo of 3+1, and today being the first day of May, I am qualified because it's already my birth month! 

    We all had our fill, Mama. We did not get to eat everything, but we got to eat what we liked, and we were so full. I think it took us almost 2 hours dining, Mama because we did not eat in a hurry. Afterwards, we already went home. Angel did not want to go home yet, but I think Ralph was already tired and he wanted to go home.

    That will be all for now, Mama. I wish you were with us in times like this.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Tuesday update

Dear Mama,

    It's 7:20 p.m., Tuesday. We just had our dinner, Mama. Ralph is getting ready to go to work. Angel is still out, though. We did not wait for her anymore because Ralph will be late if we did. She advised us earlier to go ahead and not wait for her. She might be home soon before Ralph goes to work, Mama.

    So far, Mama, the grill house  beside us that reopened has been quiet. They are not as loud as the one that was here before the pandemic. I surely hope it continues this way, Mama. And I hope I can already heal from this anxiety attacks I'm having as the evening approaches.

    It will the 10th year of company on October, and to celebrate, my officemates are planning to on a trip, and most probably it will be Thailand. The company will paying for the airfare and accommodation. For the expenses there, it will be on us - food, activities, etc. Because I did not join them last year in Japan, I am being egged to join them now. I don't know. It's like I am forced, Mama. The only problem is the pocket money. 

    Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. It will be my birthday next week, and we still do not have any plans. I hope you will visit me on my birthday, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                      Daddy

Fridate with Angel

Dear Mama,

It's already past midnight but I thought I'd write a short letter before sleeping. Angel and I earlier went to SM Telabastagan where we had early dinner and then we looked around for a while.  

Ralph attended an event, and Edgar was with his officemates. It was just me and Angel, so I thought of taking her out.

After walking around the mall, we went to Angeles City for coffee. We went home at around 11 p.m., Mama.

I thought of taking Angel because she was sick earlier this week. She needed a little change of atmosphere. I hope it helped, Mama.

And that would be all, Mama. I did say it's just a short letter. Please guide our children. And please pray for my peace.

I miss you, Mama.

I love you.

Daddy 

They opened up

Dear Mama,

    They are opening up. I am talking about the grill house slash restobar beside us, Mama. The renovations are still ongoing, but they are already opening up probably to generate cash inflows. After all, they've been closed for more than a month due to renovations.

    I am not sure now if we're still to going to enjoy peaceful and quiet nights at home, Mama. They put some microphone and stage outside, and they were practicing probably last night. I can hear them, Mama. Maybe not as loud and annoying as the previous owners, but I can hear them.

    It has triggered my anxiety, Mama and I cannot function normally in my daily routines. There is always this fear of having chaotic nights due to noises, Mama. Worse, I cannot report them because they are in connection with the vice mayor already. I don't know how they are connected but I already saw her twice going to the place. The second one being their family's private event being held there. It seems they are already friends, if they weren't friends before.

    I don't know how to procced from here, Mama.

                                                                                                            Daddy

Monday after Easter

Dear Mama.

    It's the Monday after Easter, or what in Australia would be referred to as Easter Monday. It's their holiday today, Mama. That's why we did not have much work earlier at the office.

    We just had our dinner, and Ralph is preparing to go to work, Mama. It's quite early, just 7:16 p.m. I am hoping he will be able to leave for work early and not consume all his extra time and still reach 8 p.m. Which he is capable of doing, Mama. Anyway, I just hope he won't be late.

    Angel feels better now. Thank you very much, Mama.

    It will be my birthday in less 3 than weeks, and it looks like I won't be able to get my birthday wish, Mama. That is to be able to release my song in Spotify. Anyway, it's not important. Maybe I don't deserve it.

    I guess that will be all for now, Mama.

    Please continue guiding our children, Mama. And please pray for my peace.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Easter Sunday

Dear Mama,

    Happy Easter!

    It's Easter Sunday, Mama. It's almost 9 a.m. and I just finished the laundry. The children are all awake. Ralph and Edgar had their breakfast earlier. Ralph bought pancit luglug and pandesal. Angel did not eat yet. She doesn't want to get up, Mama. She is better now, although she wants to rest.

    The long weekend is over and tomorrow we will be back to work. Back to reality, as they say, Mama. It has been a quiet 4 days here in our neighborhood. The restobar beside us is closed. Tomorrow, the renovations will continue, and I'm not sure if they will open tomorrow. But they are almost done, Mama. So, I don't know what to expect once everything's finished. I still don't understand why these businesses are allowed now in residential areas.

    It will be my birthday in less than 3 weeks, Mama. I don't have anything planned. But I do wish for the health of all our children and a peaceful life, especially in the house.

    I don't have anything more to say. Please make Angel feel better.

    I'm sorry, Mama.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Sorry, Mama. Angel is sick again

Dear Mama,

    As if things aren't already bad, it has gotten worse. Angel is sick again, Mama. I'm really sorry. I am not taking good care of our children. She was fine last night when she arrived home from the mall. 

    Please make her well, Mama.

    I'm sorry.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Worse

Dear Mama,

    I don't know what happened, but I don't think I can still continue. I'm tired, Mama. I want to go home with you. 

Saturday night

Dear Mama,

    It's around 7:30 p.m., Saturday. It's just me and Angel at home right now, Mama. Edgar attended the birthday party of his officemate, while Ralph attended an event that he's been joining almost every week for about a month now. They'll be home probably around 10 p.m. or later.

    Angel and I already had our dinner, Mama. I just ordered food for delivery. It costed me an extra money, but at least Angel was able to eat what she wanted to eat, Mama.

    I don't know what to say. 

    The restobar beside us is under renovation and they're not operating for more than 3 weeks now. That means it's been quiet for some time, Mama. However, the renovation work is about to be finished. Probably next week, or at least after Holy Week. I don't know what to expect after that, Mama. I'm not sure if we can still enjoy quiet evenings then.

    Sometimes I wish you were really reading my letters, Mama. I wish I can really talk to you.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                Daddy

My APE results

Dear Mama,

    I had my annual physical examinations last Wednesday and the results were sent via email yesterday, Thursday. I checked them this morning, Mama. Everything seems to be okay. Everything, except the ECG, Mama.

    The reading says there is a deviation in my sinus rhythm on my left axis, and advised to consult with an internist. I hope it's nothing serious, Mama.

    I'm feeling a burst of paranoia attack right now.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Midweek update

Dear Mama,

    It's 10 p.m. now, Tuesday night. Ralph is already in his work, Mama. He left at 8 p.m. earlier. I just finished uploading another cover video on my TikTok account hahaha.... 

    Tomorrow is a holiday, Mama. But Edgar said they will be working tomorrow. I have no work, but I will leaving in the morning for our annual physical examination, Mama. I hope everything will be okay.

    Remember the stupid idea I had last time, Mama? The one where I planned in joining the audition for an acoustic singer in a restobar? Well, I did not join, Mama. I was not able to find the courage. I did not have the guts, Mama. That's why I'm just singing on TikTok haha...

    Anyway, I just want to say hi. I hope I am making you proud, or at least happy somehow, Mama.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                            Daddy

A stupid idea

 Dear Mama,

    Ralph has left for work. He should be reaching the terminal any minute now, Mama. Edgar is washing the dishes, and Angel is still asleep. She did not join us for dinner earlier. She'll just have her dinner when she wakes up later, Mama.

    Yesterday, we went out for dinner and coffee just here in Marisol, Mama. We were supposed to leave at around 6 p.m., but it started raining. We were able to leave at around 7:30 p.m. We had ramyun first, and then we had coffee. They were just beside each near the main gate, Mama. We went home past 9 p.m.

    I had a very stupid idea, Mama. I'm even laughing at myself for thinking about it. There will be an audition for an acoustic singer/performer at a restobar here in Angeles City. It's quite a popular place, Mama because a celebrity is part-owner of the place. 

    I have this crazy idea that I want to join the audition, Mama. It's stupid I know. I don't have a beautiful voice, I don't play the guitar well, and I'm not even good-looking to begin with. So, why am I dreaming? 

    I was just hoping I could still be a good performer, Mama. You know, music and humor, which is my brand. But again, I am doubting myself. Should I join, Mama?

                                                                                                            Daddy

Edgar's birthday celebration

Dear Mama,

    Last Saturday, we celebrated Edgar's birthday with Angel's Pizza in Dau. Edgar chose the venue because there was a Figaro coffee shop just upstairs, and there weren't much people there, Mama. So, we had pizza first (which we were not able to finish, so we had to take them home), and then we had coffee upstairs. Afterwards, we went straight home because Angel and Ralph were already sleepy. Actually, I was, too.

    When we reached home, we first sang happy birthday for Edgar. I bought birthday cake which was delivered Saturday, morning. However, after singing happy birthday song for Edgar, and after he blew the candle, we put the cake back to the fridge, because we were all too full and tired haha... And that was Edgar's birthday celebration, Mama... part 1.

    Yesterday, Sunday, we went to Marquee Mall to check out the book sale of National Book Store. We were able to buy 5 books, Mama. I finally found a copy of The Atomic Habit which Angel wanted to read. I hope she does, Mama. It's with her now.

    After buying the books, we roamed the mall a bit and decided to eat at Yakimix. Since it is still Edgar's birth month, we availed of the birthday promo, which was just 3 +1. We had to make sure Edgar was bringing his ID, though. After dinner, we went to CBTL, although I don't think any of us ordered coffee. We just drank juice, ice tea, frappe, but no coffee. And then we went straight home to rest, Mama. And that was the second part of Edgar's birthday celebration, Mama.

    In celebrations like this, I really wish you were still with us, Mama. I'm sure, Ralph could have spoiled you with all the food you wanted to eat. We miss you, Mama. I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                                Daddy

Halo-halo tonight

Dear Mama,

    Angel treated me with halo-halo tonight. We bought from the sari-sari store near us, Mama. They were actually packing up the ingredients for the halo-halo because it was already past 8 p.m. Angel asked if she can still buy, and fortunately they accommodated her. That's why I had halo-halo tonight, Mama. It was delicious!

    Ralph is already at work now. He left earlier around 8 p.m, before we bought halo-halo. 

    Anyway, that's all I have to say for now, Mama. I enjoyed the halo-halo Angel bought for me.

    Please continue guiding our children, Mama. Please pray for my peace.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                  Daddy

The week that was and the week that will be

Dear Mama,

    Our children and I went to SM Clark today. Today is Sunday and we went to the Big Bad Wolf Book sale at the SMX Convention Center, Mama. I thought I'd find some books I'd like, but they were expensive so I did not buy anything. Ralph bought a couple of books, and Angel bought a notebook. Afterwards, Ralph had his haircut and then we had dinner, courtesy of Ralph, of course. Then we went home, Mama.

    It was supposed to be an ordinary week last week, Mama, except that Ralph had fever last Thursday. I advised him to take a sick leave, but instead he took just a half-day sick leave. He left last Thursday at 12 midnight. He seems to be fine now. 

    Next week will be Edgar's birthday, and we still do not know what to do to celebrate it. I still do not have any gift for him, Mama. I don't know what to give him. Giving them gifts is getting tougher now that they are already grown up, Mama.

    Anyway, I think that will be all for now, Mama. I really don't have anything much to say, except I'm getting more followers now on TikTok haha.... but I will tell more of that in my future letters, Mama.

    Please continue to guide our children, and please pray for my peace.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                    Daddy

Sunday update

Dear Mama,

    Edgar just arrived home before I started this letter. He came from his company outing, Mama. He left yesterday (Saturday) morning, and they stayed overnight in Zambales. Ralph, Angel, and I went to Marquee Mall this afternoon, we had dinner at Subway and then we went home, Mama.

    Yesterday, it was only Angel and I who went to the supermarket for our grocery shopping. Edgar already left then for his outing, while Ralph had his seminar for his housing loan in PAGIBIG. Good thing Angel and I were able to managed.

    During my check up with my doctor last Friday, he said the laboratory results were okay. That means I read it right, Mama. Although, I will still continue with my maintenance. I guess, that will be really a part of me for the rest of my life.

    Right now, I'm just preparing to sleep, Mama. Tomorrow's Monday again. It's a new week. Hopefully, there'll be better things to come for us.

    I guess that will be all for now, Mama. Please continue guiding us, especially our children. And please pray for my peace.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                           Daddty

Improved lab results

Dear Mama,

    I got my lab results today. I had my blood extraction last Monday, Mama. After getting my lab results, I immediately went home without looking at it. I did not open the result until after I finished the laundry and did all my errands. Because I was afraid of the results, Mama. I am always afraid every time I have my quarterly lab test.

    I opened the envelope and unfolded the paper, Mama. I looked at the results slowly, checking if they are still within the normal range. Because that is the only way I know how to check it, Mama. Good thing, all of them are within the range.

    Then, I looked for the page containing the comparisons from the previous months, Mama. I saw that most of them have improved! A lot of them are lower than the previous quarters - my blood sugar, cholesterol, and uric acid are all lower than the previous quarter, Mama.

    I hope I am reading my lab results correctly. I know, I still to have wait for the verdict of my doctor which I will see on Friday, Mama. It may not be a reason for my medicines to be removed or reduced, but maybe soon I will get there.

    That's all I want to say, Mama. I hope you're happy with my good news. I hope things will continue to get better for us.

    Please pray for my peace.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                Daddy

Trip to Tarlac

Dear Mama,

    The children and I went to Tarlac today, or specifically Capas, Tarlac. We rented a van, as requested by Ralph. We left the house at past 7 a.m. and we reached our destination at 8 a.m. We went there to check the house that Ralph is buying, Mama. Yes, Mama. Ralph is finally getting a house. I'm not sure if this is the 2nd or 3rd attempt already. 

    The property is quite small, Mama. I don't think we will fit in there, especially with the things that we have accumulated. But at least,  Ralph will have a property in his name. I know how great that feels. I don't know what his plans are - if he'll be living in there, or he'll ask us to live there with him, or he'll have it rented. Because it crossed his mind earlier, which I think is a good option. Anyway, the house is not yet finished, there is still a lot of work to be done, and Ralph still has to get his housing loan approved.

    After checking the house, we had our breakfast at the nearest Jollibee there, upon the suggestion of Angel because she is trying to complete the toys from their kiddie meal. After we had our breakfast, we went to visit the Monasterio De Tarlac, because we have so many time left. The van we rented was supposed to be used for 12 hours.

    We reached the Monasterio at 10 a.m., Mama and the mass was just starting. Although we did not attend the mass completely. We just visited, and said short prayers. Afterwards, we looked around to see what was there, and also took some photos. We left at past 11 a.m., Mama.

    We reached Clark at 1 p.m., and we had our lunch at Aling Lucing. Although, Angel did not eat because she was not feeling well. Afterwards, we went home already. We were not able to fully use to van, because we have nowhere to go, and Angel needed to get home to rest. Also, I don't want Ralph to spend so much. Angel felt better when we reached home, but she needed to rest.

    I guess that will be all for now, Mama. I just want to tell about the house Ralph was buying. I hope you're proud of him. Wish you can see him today.

    I miss you, Mama. Please pray for my peace.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

Another scare from Angel

Dear Mama,

    I had another scare from Angel yesterday. When I arrived home in the afternoon, I heard her shouting as she was calling me from the room. I rushed to see what happened to her. She was complaining from pain in her stomach, Mama. She said it was acid, and it was painful. She was crying, Mama.

    I went to the nearest drugstore to buy her antacid, and some bread for her to eat. She took the medicine, and also ate a little. After a while, she said she was feeling better. There was still pain, but it was not as intense as it was before. She was calmer, Mama. 

    In the evening, after dinner and after Edgar washed the dishes, he called me and said Angel was hot. I immediately went to her, Mama. She was a bit hot, although she wasn't feeling anything nor complaining of any pain. I got a small towel, washed with cold water, wiped her hands, head, and face. I also gave her paracetamol, Mama.

    After that when she said she's okay. I went to my bed and told Edgar to call me if anything happened. She was okay throughout the night, Mama. Although she did not sleep well, because every time I went out to pee, I saw her seated at the table.

    She was better when I left work this morning, Mama.

    I'm sorry, Mama. I should be taking good care of our children, but I am failing. Please help me, Mama. I don't know what to do. I'm sorry.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Home from Nanay's birthday celebration

Dear Mama,

    We are home now from Nanay's birthday celebration. We arrived at around 9 p.m. (it's 10 p.m. now), but I folded the laundry and tidy up some things. Although only Edgar and Angel went home with me, Mama. Ralph was left there to spend the night with his cousins. You know how social he is. His work tomorrow will be at night anyway, so I just let him. I reminded him of his check up with his doctor tomorrow, though.

    There were 2 celebrations for Nanay's birthday today, as I mentioned in my previous letter. Lunch time was with relatives from Novaliches and Manila, and some of Nanay's friends at the church. We had it a restaurant in Infinity square in Pulung Maragul.

    Then, at the evening, it was with our relatives here from Angeles City, and our family. Only Dela Cruz siblings were present during lunch time. At the evening, we were complete - including nephews, nieces, and grandchildren. It was great seeing relatives from time to time. I hope Nanay was still able to appreciate all this celebration, Mama.

    Well, that's all for now, Mama. Tomorrow, it's back to work. It's just another Manic Monday.

    Please pray for us, Mama. Please pray for my peace.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Nanay's birthday tomorrow

Dear Mama,

    We will be celebrating Nanay's 95th birthday tomorrow. I think I mentioned this already in a previous letter. There will be lunch where we will be catering to cousins from Novaliches and Paranaque, and then dinner for the rest of the family and relatives here in Angeles. It has always been like that, Mama. There was never just a single celebration for Nanay's birthday. She deserves it. Good thing, Ate Let and Koya Boy are willing to spend for her. Although this year, they asked the rest of the family to share in the expenses. Which I believe is good, at least we have a part in the celebration.

    Angel already finished his medications and nebulizer sessions, Mama. She's feeling better, although there were instances she just feels weak or doesn't feel well. I think it's more from her lack of sleep and exercise. I hope she gets well without anymore complications.

    Edgar finished his medications, too Mama. He is also feeling better now. A lot better that when he was sick 2 weeks ago. Ralph, on the other hand, is still coughing. He is still taking his maintenance for his hypertension, Mama. He was supposed to have his quarterly check up last Wednesday, but his doctor was not available and it was rescheduled on Monday. He was not able to get his lab results, yet. Praying they are better, Mama.

    Next week, we will be going to Tarlac to check the house that Ralph bought, Mama. Yes, Mama. Our son already bought a house. It is already his second attempt, if not the third, to get a house. The first one, he had some problem and did not pursue it. He was not able to get his deposit payments. Finally, he was able to push through with this one. I hope he'll be okay financially with this purchase. It's quite far, it's in Tarlac, but it's okay.

    I guess, that will be all for now, Mama. Please pray for our children. Please pray for my peace.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Updates

Dear Mama,

    Just want to give you some updates.

    Angel is continuing with her medicines and nebulizer sessions. I'm just having difficulties following up because I am at work. I have to call her every now and then to nag and remind her. She remembers, Mama. Except that she sleeps at daytime, that's our only problem. She will complete her medicines and nebulizer sessions on Saturday, Mama. She said she's feeling better. Please make her well, Mama.

    Edgar is also on medications. He'll complete his antibiotics today, Mama. He is having some bouts with gout, too just like Ralph. He said it might be a side effect of his medicines. Hopefully he'll fully recover, too. We'll be celebrating his birthday, soon.

    Ralph is still working nightshift, Mama, He is just on his 3rd month. He also under medications, but for maintenance. He also had problem with his breathing last month, before Edgar and Angel. I hope his schedule will not take its toll on him.

    That's all for now, Mama. I'm sorry I was not able to take good care of our children.

    Please pray for my peace. I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                Daddy