How long?

Dear Mama,

How long do I still have to wait? I'm tired.


Daddy

what to do now?

Dear Mama,

I'm lost. I know I shouldn't be. I really don't know where to go to now, Mama or what I want to do. I am disoriented at present. I really wanted to rest, Mama.

I wish I could be with you. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Back home from the hospital

Dear Mama,

We're now back home from the hospital. Ralph will only need to continue medications at home. He needs maintenance now because of his sickness, Mama. I'm sorry. I was not able to take care of him. I haven't bought his medicines yet, I still do not have money. The money I got from begging (again) were just enough to pay the hospital bills. I hope to find money to buy his medicines tomorrow. One of your friends said she'll send us money.

What worries me now, Mama is not just Ralph, but also Edgar and Angel. Like what I told in my letter, Edgar was displaying the same symptom Ralph has, he got sick too. Angel, on the other hand, also said she is also experiencing difficulty in breathing lately.

Please Mama, help me take care of the kids. Make them well, Mama. I feel sorry for them because they don't have a mother to take care of them. It's just not the same, Mama. It looks like I'm not good for them. There's really no substitute for your caring, Mama. If only you were here, they wouldn't be sick like this. I'm sorry, Mama.

I miss you. I wish you were still here with us.

I'm talking nonsense again. I'm sorry, Mama. I guess I need to stop now, lest I irritate you. Take care of yourself, Mama. I love you.


Daddy

Ralph is in the hospital... and Edgar is sick too

Dear Mama,

Ralph is in the hospital right now, the doctor diagnosed acute asthma. He having difficulty breathing yesterday. He is better now, but he is still in the hospital. Edgar is also sick, he is also showing the symptoms that Ralph had yesterday. I'm sorry, Mama. It looks like I am not taking care of the kids very well. I'm really sorry.


Daddy

We had a good time and you'll be proud of Ralph

Dear Mama,

We had a simple celebration of Ralph's birthday yesterday. We just went out and ate at a coffee shop. It was rather late though when we went out, Mama. Nonetheless, the kids enjoyed it. It was the first time I took them to the place. If only we weren't short on cash, I would have taken them someplace else afterward. Fortunately, the kids weren't complaining and were quite satisfied where we ate.

You will be proud of our son, Mama. They had some sort of accounting quiz olympiad in school yesterday, and he was one of the contestant. It was a group contest actually, and their group got the third place in the contest, Mama. I guess, it was a perfect birthday gift for him.

But what will make you feel even prouder about him, Mama were the words of his friends. By their messages, it looks like our Ralph is really a good friend to them. You raised him well, Mama. I bet he got that from you, being charismatic with other people. I can sense that they appreciate Ralph's friendship. I'm really proud of him.

Well, that's all about Ralph's birthday, Mama. I hope next time, we could do a bigger celebration and that he could invite his friends. But as for now, that will do. Take care of yourself, Mama.

I miss you.

I love you, Mama.


Daddy

Ralph turns 18 today

Dear Mama,

Our Ralph turns 18 today. I'm sorry if there weren't any celebrations, Mama. As you know, we've been having some problem with our finances lately. I plan to take the kids out tonight though. Our son is growing up, Mama. Although he is still have those childish traits, he is slowly becoming responsible. I should be satisfied with that, and demand him to mature so fast. I should let him enjoy his youth, Mama. I'm sure, you are as proud of our son too Mama.

That would be all for now, Mama. Please take care of yourself. I miss you, Mama. I love you.


Daddy

Ralph and I are okay

Dear Mama,

Ralph and I are okay now. I was the first one to talk to him though, I figured I am the older one and should be the one to understand. I hope he was also able to contemplate on what happened to us, Mama. I want him to grow up responsible. But I still feel sorry about hitting him, Mama. I wish I didn't do it.

It will be his birthday on Tuesday, Mama. I still don't have a gift for him. I'm not sure if I would be able to squeeze it on the budget. But I'll try to see that I can, Mama, it's Ralph after all. You know how I love my son, and how I go out of my way just to do things for him.

Anyway, I have more house chores to do Mama. I am not working today, so I better catch up on cleaning the house. Until next letter Mama. Take care of yourself. I love you, Mama. I miss you.


Daddy

I'm sorry, I failed

Dear Mama,

I'm sorry. I failed in raising our kids. This evening, I hit Ralph on the face. I was mad, Mama. He was supposed to come early, I told him that and he agreed. Unfortunately, he didn't. And when I asked him why, he couldn't answer me.

I kept on texting and calling him in afternoon Mama, but he wasn't replying, and I know he was doing that on purpose.

What am I doing wrong, Mama? Why am I failure in almost everything? I can't even get the respect of my own kids!

I'm sorry, Mama. I'm really sorry.


Daddy

Getting tired... again

Dear Mama,

Why do I always get the feeling that I am tired? I always feel drained, physically, mentally and emotionally. Sometimes, I just stop and doesn't even want to move. Staring at spaces for I don't know how long and I don't even know what I'm looking at. It's really hard when you have no one to talk to, Mama.

The  kids are still sleeping, but I will wake them up in a while because Ralph will be having his test. He is having his midterm exam, Mama, and today is the last day of the test. We'll be having our breakfast after this. Guide him through his test, Mama.

I am dreaming of having my poems published in a book, Mama. I want to have my REFLECTION printed and become a book. You know it's my dream, Mama. I wish it can become a reality. I hope my poems are good enough for printing.

I think I already heard Ralph woke up. I'll prepare for breakfast now, Mama. 'til next letter. Take care of yourself. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

A rainy morning

Dear Mama,

Good morning. Angel and Edgar are now taking a bath, before we'll be having our breakfast. Ralph won't have his class until this afternoon. It's their mid-term exam, please guide him, Mama. I won't wake him up early this time. In a while, I'll be having breakfast with Angel and Edgar.

It's raining right now, Mama. I hope it will stop when it's time to go to school. I'll be going to Manila today too. So please, help me pray for a good weather.

The kids are fine, Mama. You don't to worry about them, you raised them well, I'm so proud of them. I'll stop my letter here, to prepare for breakfast. Take care of yourself, Mama. I miss you.

I love you, Mama.


Daddy