Thursday, August 2, 2012

Is it a cause for alarm?

Dear Mama,

You know how I've been telling you how I'm not feeling well, cold and weak, right? This afternoon, my friend Roland brought his electronic BP gauge in the office and checked my blood pressure. The screen on the device registered 135 over 102. I know that is not my normal BP, but should I be alarmed, Mama?

I thought what I was feeling was just tension from the anxieties I've had this past few weeks, that is why I was sure I would be okay. I shouldn't have let him read my BP, at least I wouldn't know. I do not like to worry about it, Mama. I was adviced to consult a doctor, but I don't know. You know how I really do not like going to doctors, Mama.

If only I could hold your hand, this fear would vanish. I know I am okay. I have to be okay. Perhaps the device misread my BP, I would like to think it did. I can't be sick, especially since you're not here. I'm talking nonsense again. I'm sorry, Mama. It's just too difficult to be alone in times like this. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.