Dear Mama,

Here I am again, back at the internet cafe. I really don't have much to say today, Mama... but I do want to talk to you. I wish I could, Mama.. I really need to talk to you.

I'm getting tired, Mama... I need you.


Daddy

My first talk went well... I guess

Dear Mama,

I just had my first talk as a writer, and everything went well. I was nervous, but I was able to survive it nonetheless. I do hope you were watching me, Mama and I hope you were proud of me.

I really don’t know what will happen next. I guess it would all depend on the impression that I made with my speech this evening at the event.

Anyway, things are fine around here, Mama. I just wanted to tell you about my talk. Please take care of yourself. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.



Daddy

New grandson

Dear Mama,

We have a new grandson! Louie's wife, May, gave birth yesterday morning to a baby boy! I saw Louie yesterday afternoon at AUFMC, and he told me the good news. I will take Angel this afternoon there to see her new nephew. She is taking her periodical test right now.

On Wednesday, it will be Ma's birthday. I haven't forgotten, Mama. I'm not sure though if we can go there because of my work and the children's schooling. Anyway, I'll see if we can arrange our schedules.

Ralph is in Baguio right now for his field trip. They went there yesterday, he'll be home this evening. Edgar, on the other hand is preparing to go to school when I left him at home (I'm at an internet cafe now, Mama).

As for me, still adjusting with my work. On Friday next week, it will be my talk at SM Clark. I hope I can prepare my piece this afternoon.

That will be all for now, Mama. Please take care of yourself.

I miss you, Mama. I love you.


Daddy

I am not strong, Mama

Dear Mama,

How are you? I know I haven’t been writing as often as I used to do, Mama. I’m sorry. I wouldn’t blame it on the disconnected internet connection at home, I admit it has nothing to do with that. It’s just that oftentimes, every time I attempt to write you a letter, I can’t think of anything without whining… complaining… and saying how I miss you and how much I wish you were here.

There were even times when I think about stopping writing all these letters for good. It’s not because I don’t want to talk to you or think of you anymore. It’s just that I am not even sure if I am still making sense, and sometimes, I even think that my letters are disturbing you when you should be resting.

I don’t know, Mama. I still haven’t gotten used to it really… being alone, I mean. There are times that I wish I can really talk to you… about a lot of things, about what’s happening to me and the kids, and hear your thoughts about it. There are times when I only wish you were here, just so I could hold your hand and embrace you.

I am not strong, Mama. I’m tired of faking it. Trying to fool everyone, especially myself, that I am in control and I can take care of things. To be honest, things have gone worse and the hurdles are getting taller while I get weaker.

Things have never been the same around here, Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

It's been a while

Dear Mama,

It's been a while since my last letter,I'm sorry about that. But it doesn't mean I think of you less, Mama. I'm sure you know that. I was just too preoccupied with many things lately, and every time I do find the time to write, I really can't think of anything to say... where I won't be whining.

It's really been very difficult lately, Mama. Trying to make both ends meet, trying so hard to prove myself, trying to maintain sanity... trying to show that I am still in control. Thus far, I'm still alive, thanks heavens.

The kids are fine, Mama. Angel seems to be very active in school. Well, she has always been actually. Edgar also is enjoying his college life. Ralph, on the other hand, seems to be spreading himself too thin in a lot of activities lately. I hope he learns to manage his time.

Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. Do not want to burden you with my whining. So, I'll stop before I get to start that. Take care of yourself, Mama. I really, really miss you. I hope to see you soon, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

I'm failing....

Dear Mama,

I'm really failing in raising the kids. I don't why they seem to quarrel more often lately. It's like they can't get along very well, Mama. They would quarrel at the slightest provocation.

I'm sorry, Mama. I'm trying everything to remind them of what you taught them and how we always want them to love each other.

I'm trying my best, Mama. Help me please... if only you were here.

I miss you, Mama.

I love you


Daddy

I raised my voice again

Dear Mama,

I raised my voice again, I'm sorry. I'm doing it more often lately, Mama. I'm so mad at myself.

Why can't I raise the kids well, Mama? I really am not doing good in guiding them. I don't know what I'll do. I do not want to be always angry, Mama.

I'm really sorry, Mama.

I passed and now I'm working

Dear Mama,

My final interview didn't really go well, but still I was given a chance to prove myself and I was taken in under probation. I started last Friday, Mama. I just hope I will be able to perform my job well and deliver the results required of me so that I will become permanent.

That's all for now, Mama. Take care of yourself. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy