Plot twists

Dear Mama,

    I went to my doctor yesterday for my quarterly check up and I brought my blood test results as I mentioned in my previous letter. I said I was worried about my blood sugar, right? Do you know what my doctor said when he saw me, Mama? He said my cholesterol has shot up. I did not even remember seeing that! I thought everything was okay except for my blood sugar which I was worried about. He even asked me if there were too many occasions lately, Mama.

    He said I went from 60+ from my previous test to 110+ in this latest lab test. He advised me to work on it, Mama - diet and exercise, or he might need to increase the dosage of my maintenance. For now, he kept my dosage at status quo, just make sure it will improve next quarter.

    When I asked him about the prediabetes result, he said I should not worry about it. It's still minimal and might be caused by the difference in fasting hours. It can be corrected, of course he also advised me on my diet.

    But that's not the only plot twist, Mama. Yesterday, at around 1 a.m., Ralph went home from work. I wasn't aware because I was sleeping then. Good thing, Edgar was still awake and he was able to open the gate for Ralph. I just read the messages in the group chat when I woke up.

    Ralph said they were sent home. Their client terminated his contract with their company, and it was 'effective immediately.' And just like that, Ralph is now unemployed. No warning, no heads up, just termination of employment. They will be paid for the whole month, Mama. After that they will have 60-day redeployment phase, wherein the company will find some client who hire them. But during those 60 days, they will be on a no-work, no-pay status, Mama. After that 60 days, when the company can't find client for them, they will have to let them go. BPO is fucked up system, Mama.

    Angel is also planning to resign. I am not sure if I already mentioned this in my previous letter, Mama. She is planning to resign because of the toxic treatment of their superiors who are all power-trippers. which by the way is common in BPOs, Mama. She hasn't filed yet, though. Although she already advised her immediate supervisor and was told she will have to render 30 days for her resignation. Which I think is stupid, Mama. They threatened her with termination, and yet if she would voluntarily resign she would have to render 30 days? That's just one shade of power-tripping I was talking about, Mama.

    So, I guess I can't retire yet, right Mama? Actually, I still have 1.5 years 'til retirement. My problem is, I don't have any savings, and our children aren't settled yet. I know, it's all fault. I'm sorry, Mama. I failed.

    I'm really sorry.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Visit to the doctor

 Dear Mama,

    Tomorrow is the day. I will go to my doctor tomorrow, Mama. And I will bring my lab test results. Although I already read the results, I'm still hoping he'll say something else. That it's just okay, we can still recover from it, it barely passed the limit, or something.

    I'm just bluffing myself, Mama. I know. The result was clear. I can't deny it. Actually, I have been experiencing the symptoms even before I had my blood test, Mama. Always tired, always thirsty, always want to pee, and always sleepy. Although I was just blaming it on lack exercise, Mama.

    I don't to be a burden to our children, Mama. 

                                                                                                    Daddy

My latest lab test results

Dear Mama,

    Last Wednesday I had my quarterly blood test for CBC, FBS, and all other things included in my prescriptions which I cannot understand. Thursday, of course, we went on our staycation for Ralph's birthday, and Friday I was too tired. So, I only got my results this morning, Mama.

    I did not immediately look at it when I got home, I had to do a lot of things in the house. When I was done, I sat down in my bed and look at the results, Mama. At first, I thought everything were okay. I mean, they are all okay, Mama. Except when I realized that I miss the first line - the FBS.

    It went over the prescribed limits, Mama. And based on the notes on the side, it was on the pre-diabetics range. Next Wednesday, I will have my quarterly check up, and I need to show my lab test results to my doctor. This is just the first it happened, Mama. I hope there won't additional medicines nor diet precautions. 

    Must be the reason why I always feel tired, Mama. I'm afraid. I feel down right now.

    I miss you, Mama. I wish you were here.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Ralph's birthday celebration

Dear Mama,

    We were able to celebrate Ralph's birthday twice this year. The first one was last week where we had our dinner at Buffet 101 in SM Clark since they have 3+1 birth month promo, Mama. The second one was last night where we had a staycation in a compound villa with pool.

    It's like we rented the whole place, Mama! Because there were no other guests. Probably because it was a weekday. That's why I enjoyed the peace and quiet of the place, while Angel enjoyed dipping in the swimming pool. Ralph, most of the time slept in the room.

    Last night we played a board game in our room. It's always fun when we play board games, Mama. Because our children are very competitive, but we were laughing all throughout the games because of the rules of the board games. We played 2 sets of games, Mama. The overall winner was Edgar.

    We had our staycation on a weekday because it was Angel's day off, Mama. The three of us - Ralph, Edgar, and I had to take avail of our VL. But it's all worth it, Mama. We had fun and we were able to rest. Of course, it would have been a better celebration if you were with us.

    I really miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

        

                                                                                                    Daddy

Ate Tey is with you now

Dear Mama,

    Ate Tey was rushed this morning to the hospital. Anna sent a voice message to the group chat saying she's not okay and they're taking her to the hospital. No details. I knew then something was wrong. Later Anna said Ate Tey had a heart attack, Mama. That's what the hospital personnel said. She said they were able to revive her, but after one hour she flatlined.

    We were all shocked, Mama. I just went to Sta. Teresita last week and she was fine. Yu-Juan also posted she was talking to her yesterday. She was not even sick nor taking maintenance. At least nothing that I know  of. Maybe we just don't know because she doesn't go to the doctor regularly. Perhaps, the only positive thing we could say about this is she did not suffer long, Mama. But still...

    That's all I wanted to say, Mama. Angel left for work already, and I'll be  waking Ralph up in a while so he can prepare for work, too.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

    

                                                                                                    Daddy

Another bout with anxiety

Dear Mama,

    Ralph just left for work, it's 10:26 p.m. now. Angel left earlier around 8 p.m., Mama. I'm about to rest now. Edgar is also in his room. 

    It was a long day, Mama. Not really tiring, but it felt long. 

    Earlier I had another bout with anxiety, Mama. I didn't know what to do. I was calling your name. I tried to sleep, but my mind won't shut down, Mama.

    I felt calmer when I played my guitar after dinner, while waiting for Ralph to leave for work.

    I miss you, Mama. I need you.

                                                                                            Daddy

Another rainy Saturday night

Dear Mama,

    It's another rainy Saturday night. It's 7:42 p.m. right now, Edgar and I already had our dinner. Ralph and Angel are not here, Mama. Angel is already at work, and Ralph attended another trivia night. They left together, Mama. Ralph booked a Grab car and dropped Angel at her work, then proceeded to the venue of his event.

    Right now, the rain is pouring heavily. Good thing it has stopped a bit earlier when Ralph and Angel were leaving. It was raining the whole day, Mama. A lot of places have been flooded because of the continuous rain. I'm praying for everyone's safety.

    That will be all for now, Mama. I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                Daddy

Nanay has been confined in the hospital

Dear Mama,

    The rain has stopped, for now. Hopefully, it won't rain again tonight when Angel and Ralph leave for work. It's 6:21 p.m. right now, and Angel is getting ready. Edgar is cooking our dinner, and also Angel's 'lunch' for her break tonight.

    Nanay has been confined in the hospital, Mama. She was admitted last Saturday, and she was discharged today, Tuesday. She spent 4 days in the hospital. Anna said they took her to AMC last Saturday because she was vomiting and chilling. The resident said she had phlegm in her back that's why they had to admit her. Her urinalysis also showed she had UTI. Today she was discharged and was given home medications, antibiotics, specifically. 

    During her stay in the hospital, she had nebulizer treatment, Mama. Which caused  her phlegm to loosen up. Anna took care of her while they were in the hospital, Mama. Hopefully, she'll completely heal and won't get sick again.

    That's all for tonight, Mama. By the way, I'm listening to my songs right now in Spotify. Because who else would stream my songs except me haha...

    I hope I'll dream of you tonight, Mama. I need to see you.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

P.S. Angel just talked to me and said she doesn't feel well, and won't work today. I hope her supervisor understands, Mama. She's really sick.

 

Haven't had a haircut for quite a while

Dear Mama,

    It's Friday night and Edgar and I just had our dinner. Angel is already at work. Ralph did not work tonight, but he's out right now to attend a trivia quiz night. An event that he usually attends during weekend, Mama. 

    I've been stressed again lately, Mama. First, our garbage hasn't been picked up. I think it's almost a month. They haven't been coming lately, or if ever they come it might be when I am at work, and Ralph and Angel are both sleeping, coming from graveyard shift, Mama. That's why our trash is filing up. I think I already have more than 5 big black bags of trash right now.

    Another one that's been stressing me is my hair, Mama. It's long and I haven't had a haircut for long time now. I think the last time I had a haircut was June, or maybe even May before my birthday. It's not that I couldn't find time, Mama. But I had to get home straight from work because I was hoping to catch the garbage truck. Yes, my stresses are connected, Mama.

    Finally, our new dog is also stressing me. She's hyperactive, Mama. A bit rowdy, and I couldn't control her. Sometimes, she is pounding on the cats, not to scare them or anything. But I think she just wanted to play, Mama. The problem is, she might be hurting them. And the cats, not used to having dogs around, are afraid of her. And another problem with her is she's tearing the plastic bags of trash, so I had to hang them so she couldn't reach them. But since our garbage is not being collected, I'm running out of spaces to hang them, Mama. Like I said before, all my stresses are connected.

    Sorry, Mama, I'm just venting out. It's really difficult when you have no one to talk to about your concerns. I really wish you were here.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                Daddy

The rain hasn't really stopped

Dear Mama,

    It's Wednesday evening, and we just had our dinner. Angel and Ralph are sleeping right now, Mama. It's Angel's day off today, so she' resting after we had our dinner. Although she asked to be woken up at 10 p.m. so her body clock won't be confused. Ralph's time won't be until later, so he's resting now. I'll wake him up 9 p.m., Mama.

    Edgar's not yet home. He sent a message that he'll be late tonight. So, I ordered food delivery again for our dinner, Mama. I'm no longer confident in cooking since Edgar took over the kitchen. That's why I'm having a problem when he's not around.

    It's been raining non-stop, Mama. We are actually on red warning signal, which is the highest signal as far as the volume of rainfall is concerned. I hope it won't be raining later when Ralph leaves for work, and when Edgar travels for home.

    I don't have anything much to say really, Mama. But I miss you so much. How I wish I can see you even just in my dream. I need your hug, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

Tatay's birthday

Dear Mama,

    It's Tatay's birthday today. Although he is already in heaven, we are still celebrating it. It will be a lunch celebration, Mama. Ralph and Edgar already left to join their cousins, aunties, and uncles in lunch. I did not go with them, Mama. 

    I was supposed to accompany Angel here at home, and she is supposed to rest because she has work tonight. But Angel isn't home yet, Mama. It's already 10:30 a.m. She said she needed to buy some things at the mall, so she waited for it to open. So, I'm home alone now. 

    Anyway, I was waiting for the garbage truck because our garbage hasn't been collected for almost a month now, Mama. The problem is, they rarely come, and when they do Ralph and Angel are sleeping because they came from night shift, while Edgar and I are still at work. I was only able to catch them when they come on weekends or late in the afternoon. That did not happen lately, Mama. I hope they come today, I'm really stressed by all the accumulated trash.

    I guess, that will all for now, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

No more family time

Dear Mama,

    It's Sunday, 6 p.m., and Angel is getting ready for work. Yes, Mama, like what I told you before, she has work on Saturdays and Sundays. Her days off are Wednesdays and Thursdays. That means there will be no more family time, or they will be rare, if ever. Ralph has work on Wednesdays and Thursdays, and both of them work night shifts, Mama.

    So, if we go out on Angel's day off (weekdays) or Ralph's (weekends), one of them will have to cut off their rest time and we will have to leave early, Mama. And we will have to watch our time because someone will need to report for work. I don't think that's a good bonding time. That's why they might really be less to no more family time, Mama.

    It's been raining heavily the whole day, Mama. Although the rain has paused for now. I hope it won't be raining when Angel leaves for work later. Edgar is better now, he's preparing our dinner.

    That will be all for now, Mama. I don't like to start whining again, so I better stop. 

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Gout to be believe in magic

Dear Mama,

    It's gout season again, or at least in our house. Ralph and Edgar are both having their bouts with gout, Mama. Ralph's was just early this week, and Edgar's started today. Ralph is getting better, Mama. Unfortunately, Edgar's is a bit painful as I see it. He's having difficulty walking, Mama. And in my mind I'm singing 'Gout to believe in magic."

    I'm just trying to be funny, Mama. But deep inside I'm worried. This gout seems to be a traitor. It strikes when you least expect it. I wish there was a way for them to be fully healed from their gout, Mama. I had my bout with gout long time ago, when you were still with us. It lasted for about 2 days, then it disappeared. I had some minor attacks, but never was as painful as Ralph's and Edgar's. And I never had it again for a long time, Mama.

    It's Angel's last day of her 2-days day off, Mama. She'll get back to work tomorrow. I think she's sleeping now, and also Edgar. Ralph is resting and will be getting ready in a while. We already had our dinner, Mama.

    It's still raining, and there's a typhoon. I just read now in Facebook that face-to-face classes in Angeles City are suspended tomorrow because of the inclement weather. I hope everything will be fine.

    I guess that's all for now, Mama. I wish I can dream of you tonight.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy 

Another rainy evening

Dear Mama,

    It's another rainy Sunday evening. It's already rainy season indeed. Angel is already at work, Mama. Although she hasn't confirmed yet. She left earlier via Grab car, but she often cannot send a message immediately because she needs to log in and settle down. This usually takes time, Mama, unfortunately. Because they only have one elevator and there are many users. She would usually send a message later during her break when she gets caught up.

    We already had our dinner, Mama. We were supposed to go to the wake tonight, Ralph and I. But I don't feel well. I got rained on this afternoon while I was taking the laundry from the clothesline because it rained suddenly. I already took medicine, Mama. I cannot be absent from work tomorrow because it's a Monday and I would need a medical certificate if I called in sick.

    That's all for tonight, Mama.

    I wish you were. I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Rainy Friday evening

Dear Mama,

    It's a rainy Friday evening, Angel just arrived at work. It's already 8 p.m., she left at 7 p.m. earlier. What used to be just a 20-minute travel took almost an hour because of the traffic caused by the rain, Mama. We just had our dinner. I hope Ralph will leave earlier tonight to avoid the traffic.

    We went out last night for dinner, Mama. Since, Angel has work on Saturday and Sunday, Ralph decided we should take our family time last night, since it was Angel's day off. 

    All our children are okay now, Mama. Although Edgar and Angel are under medications. Angel has antibiotics prescribed again to her. Her total medicines reached 2k, Mama. It was another unexpected expense. I'm praying they will be healthy soon.

    That's all for tonight, Mama. I wish I can hug you right now.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                            Daddy

Bingo!

Dear Mama,

    It happened. Angel is sick. She was already not feeling well yesterday, but she said she can manage and she was taking paracetamol. She went home from work this morning sick, Mama. She was supposed to go the clinic today for her photo light therapy session for her skin condition, but she did not go because of her fever. The only good thing right now is today is her day off until tomorrow. So, she will have time to rest, Mama. I hope she gets better. I'm sorry, Mama.

    Edgar is okay now. At least he is saying he is okay. He is preparing our dinner now. Angel requested for a soup for dinner, Mama. Ralph is okay, although I'm worried about his cough, Mama. I'm telling him to go visit his doctor to consult his cough.

    As for me, I don't know if I am sick or it's just age catching up with me, Mama. But I'm feeling cold right now. I feel cold almost every night, Mama. It's been raining every late afternoon and evening these past days. Sometimes, I am rained on when I go home from work.

    Also, I'm still not getting much streams for my songs in Spotify. I guess I'm not really cut for it. Sorry, I have wasted money for producing and releasing my songs.

    That's all for now, Mama. Please make Angel well.

    I wish you were here.

                                                                                            Daddy

I'm sorry, our son is sick again

Dear Mama,

    I'm sorry. Edgar is sick again. He came home this afternoon saying he has a headache, so I told him to rest and I'll just buy food for our dinner, Mama. While he was resting, Angel took his temperature and he has fever, Mama. He was not able to eat properly when we were having our dinner. He already took medicines. He won't be working tomorrow. I'm really sorry, Mama.

    Ralph is getting ready to work now. He was absent last Friday because of flu. I hope he won't be sick again. Angel is already at work, Mama. She left past 7 p.m. earlier. It's 9 p.m. now.

    I'm sorry about Edgar, Mama. Please help me make him well.

    

                                                                                                    Daddy

Lazy Sunday afternoon

Dear Mama,

    It's a lazy Sunday afternoon. We had a late lunch because Edgar fell asleep, which is just okay since it's a Sunday. Just finished taking a bath and I was planning to go out, but I got lazy so I didn't. 

    Ralph seems to be okay now, Mama. Although he's still taking medicines. Angel also takes paracetamol because she felt she'll also feeling a little bit feverish, Mama. I think it's the weather. I am also not really feeling well, but I just have to ignore it because tomorrow's Monday. I cannot be absent, lest I will be required to submit a medical certificate, even if it's just a one day sick leave.

    That's all for today, Mama. Just updating you on our children. I might take a nap, too. I feel sleepy, but I had to wait for my hair to get dry because I don't to get blind hahaha...

    I miss you, Mama. 

    I love you.

                                                                                            Daddy

It's Ralph's turn

 Dear Mama,

    We just had our dinner. Angel is already at her work. She left earlier before we had our dinner, Mama. It's their graduation from the training, and next week she'll be in the production. So far, she's enjoying, Mama. She just has some complains with superiors but I hope she'll learn to adapt, or at least knows how to handle it, so she could stay longer, Mama.

    It's now Ralph who is sick. I'm really sorry, Mama. I don't know what happened to him. He was okay when he left for work last night. I just saw him when I came home this afternoon. He already took medicine, Mama. At first he wanted to go to work tonight. I had to convince him to take the day off, because I don't think he can work in the condition he is in, Mama. I had to be mad at him, though. I had to be angry before he would listen. He messaged his office while we were having dinner earlier, Mama. He is now resting in his room.

    I'm really sorry, Mama. I cannot take good care of our children. They would have been better off if... I'm sorry.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Edgar is sick again

Dear Mama,

    Angel just left for work. I booked her a Grab car and she's on her way now, Mama. We already had our dinner, although it's McDonalds delivery for now. Ralph is resting, he'll get ready by 9 p.m.

    Edgar is sick, Mama. He has fever. He came home from work sick. Although, he already messaged us that he was sick while he was on his way home. Which is why we had food delivery for our dinner tonight.

    I'm sorry, Mama. I don't know what made Edgar sick again this time. He was okay last night, and when he left for work this morning. I'm praying he'll feel well soon. Although I advised him to rest tomorrow.

    That's all for now, Mama. I really sorry.

                                                                                                                Daddy

Angel's treat last night

 Dear Mama,

    Yesterday, Sunday, we went out to eat for our family day. It was Angel's treat, Mama. We were supposed to go to a buffet restaurant in Clark, unfortunately, it was full. Our fault, we did not bother to check and ask for reservation. So, we walked around the Clark Parade Ground. Most of the restaurant there are a bit expensive, Mama. We checked one which was within Angel's budget. It wasn't exactly fine dining, but it's pricey, although still within our baby's budget, Mama. We had our fill, and I was satisfied.

    After dinner, we walked around the Clark Parade Ground again to see if there was a night market, which fortunately, there was. We just looked around. I almost bought another Hot Wheels car, Mama. Good thing I was able to restrain myself. Ralph bought a Pokemon stuffed toy, while Angel bought some postcards, Mama.

    Then we went to a coffee shop for some drinks, Mama. The coffee shop we went to was quite big, Mama. It has three floors! And it was very cold, I almost fell asleep. We went home past 9 p.m., and we immediately rest upon reaching home.

    By the way, Angel is already at work now, Mama. We already had our dinner, and Ralph will be preparing for work in a while.

    That's all for tonight, Mama. I miss you so much, especially when we're going out like last night. 

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Had a great time at my gig last night

Dear Mama,

    I had a great time at my gig last night. It was not perfect, but I had a great time, Mama. I had a very receptive and appreciative audience. And I think I'm funny hahaha.... I had some bloopers - wrong chords, wrong words, bad punchline deliveries, and the like, but it didn't matter to me, Mama. I was having fun.

    It was a bit exhausting, though. I played for 1 hour and 30 minutes straight! I had an option to offer open mike to people who wanted to sing, but I did not opt to it because I might not be able to accompany them. Beside, I should be the star of the show haha... Kidding, it's the first reason, really.

    I was more confident last night compared to my previous gig there, Mama. Angel noticed it, too. Perhaps because the weather was okay. And I had some young people telling me after the show, "Ang galing n'yo po!" That felt great, Mama. 

    It was far from perfect, but I had a great time. I hope I made you proud, Mama. Wish you were there watching me.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                            Daddy

Friday night again

Dear Mama,

    It's Friday night again. I'm waiting for Ralph, he is preparing to leave for work, Mama. Angel already left earlier. Edgar just arrived home a few minutes ago.

    I just finished practicing for my gig tomorrow, Mama. I'm praying I will do well and I will not encounter any technical issues like last time. I'll wear a new t-shirt design for my Roy2dworld logo, Mama. I'm excited, although still a bit nervous. 

    That's all for now, Mama. Please pray for me.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

Feeling overwhelmed right now

Dear Mama,

    I am feeling overwhelmed right now. I don't know if it's really overwhelmed, or just another episode of anxiety, or I am overwhelmed with anxiety. I don't know what I feel right now, Mama. But I know I am not okay.

    I have a busking gig on Saturday at the Museo Ning Angeles again, Mama. The place where I had a lot of bloopers last May. I'll be back there this Saturday, and I am afraid I'll have the same experience again. I don't know why I said yes, but Angel was pushing me, Mama. I had problem with the spotlight then. I cannot see the markings on my guitar fret that's why I was playing wrong chords in some of the songs. I also had problem with my audio. It was weak, not clear, and I think it was grounded because I was having some crackling sounds. Because of that, my confidence was affected and I struggled throughout my set. I'm not so sure about this Saturday. I also need a new set and a script.

    There's a new puppy in our garage, Mama. I heard it crying in front of our gate around 4:30 a.m. today. I thought it was one of the kittens. I fed it, and it went inside the garage. Because I was afraid it might hurt the kittens, I put it back outside, Mama. But it didn't leave and it didn't stop crying. Until it was able to forced itself through one of the grills, Mama. Now, I don't know what to do it. There's a tiny kitten that seems to be afraid of the puppy. The puppy wanted to play but the kitten was so small, Mama. The tiny kitten is also new here, it just appeared in front of gate last week. Somebody must have dropped it there.

    These, and a lot of other things, Mama. I don't know. I need to practice for my set this Saturday. But I cannot focus because of this anxiety. I don't know what to do, Mama.

    I wish you were here.

                                                                                                Daddy

Monday fever

Dear Mama,

    I got rained on earlier when I was going home. It was just a drizzle, Mama. After a while, I felt cold while I was resting. I felt I had fever, Mama. I took paracetamol. I feel better now. I think.

    Angel is already at work, Mama. Ralph is still sleeping. I will wake him up later so he can prepare for work. We already had our dinner, Mama. I feel sleepy now, but I had to wait until Ralph leaves for work.

    That will be all for now, Mama. I really don't have anything much to say.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Rainy Friday night

Dear Mama,

    It's a rainy Friday night. It's past 7 p.m. and Angel is on her way to work, Mama. I just booked her Grab car, and she's on her way now. The rain started as she was about to get into the car. I hope they'll have a smooth travel, Mama. Although traffic is expected because it's Friday and it's raining. I'm monitoring her through my app, Mama.

    Ralph is also getting ready for work. He said he's going to leave early tonight, and he won't be having dinner here. Edgar is still not here, Mama. He and his officemate went out for coffee night. So, once Ralph leaves, I'll be all alone here, Mama. Edgar won't be home until probably 10 p.m. the earliest.

    It think the rain has stopped, Mama. Or it just rested. It's been on and off, Mama. I hope the cats and kitten in our garage our safe. I couldn't let them all in the house, Mama.

    I already had my dinner earlier. I ordered tocilog from the apartment in front of us. I also ordered for Angel's lunch break later at work. I'm not sure if it's the app lagging or there's really traffic in Balibago right now, but the car in the tracker is not moving, Mama. It's seems they are already inside Clark.

    That's all for now, Mama. I have to clean the cats' litter boxes.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                        Daddy

Just another Monday

Dear Mama,

    It's just another Monday. Angel is already at work, it's 8 p.m. now. Ralph is getting ready for work, too. We already had our dinner, Mama. Not sure really what to write here.

    Yesterday, we went to SM City Clark just to eat, Mama. Ralph attended an event after lunch and he met us at SM around 5 p.m. for the dinner, and afterwards we went straight home. We were not able to have coffee, which might have frustrated Angel because I felt she didn't want to go home. Although she immediately fell asleep as soon as we arrived home. She was actually already sleeping while we were still in the Grab car, Mama.

    Anyway, I really do not know to say. But I wanted to talk to you, Mama. I wish I could.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Wednesday night

 Dear Mama,

    It's Wednesday night, and we already had our dinner. Angel is already at work, Mama. She left at 7 p.m. earlier (it's 8:20 p.m. now) before we had our dinner. But Edgar was able to pack her 'lunch' for work, Mama. Ralph is resting now. I will wake him up later at 9 p.m.

    I really don't have much to say now, Mama. Still grinding while dragging my whole existence. Also waiting for my songs in Spotify to be noticed. I'm still not getting much streams, Mama. I guess I just wasted my time and money.

    I'm a bit sleepy now, Mama. But I have to fight it because I still have to wake Ralph up later.

    Anyway, I guess that will be all for now, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Friday anxiety

Dear Mama,

    It's almost 5 p.m., I'll be waking Angel up in a while so she can prepare for work. Although I'm not sure if she's okay. Earlier she sent a message while I was work that she's not feeling well, Mama. She said she'll take a nap and see if she'll feel better later. I hope she is, so she can complete the whole week, Mama.

    Edgar just arrived home from work. He is the one preparing the our dinner, as well as Angel's packed 'lunch' for work. Their lunch is around 11 p.m., though. 

    I'm having anxiety again, Mama. It's Friday, aside from Angel's condition I'm worried again about the restobar beside us. I hope there won't be any problem tonight.

    I'll be reporting the house rent balance again by the end of month, Mama. I am worried because I have so many advances that I might not be able to pay off. Ate Let will get mad at me again. I got caught up again in expenses, Mama. And it seems worse this time. Angel has had a lot of check ups, laboratories, and consultations. Aside from other indulgences to make her feel better. I'm sorry, Mama. I thought things will get better for us financially. I might resort to lenders just to cover up for my advances, Mama.

    I guess that'll be all for now. I'm sorry for the problems, Mama.

    I wish you were here.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

Father's Day celebration and my quarterly check up

Dear Mama,

    Yesterday, our children and I celebrated Father's Day. Well, sort of. We went to Marquee Mall yesterday, Mama. There wasn't really much too see there, except for a car show. What was interesting, Mama was that one of the cars there has a plate number NEM 9999, I forgot the numbers so I just wrote 9s here haha... But the letters  spelled NEM, Mama! It was your nickname! It felt like you were with us yesterday :)

    Then we had our dinner, which was of course courtesy of Ralph, Mama. There was too many pieces of chicken wings and potato rings that we had to take home what we can't finish, Mama. But it was delicious and we had our fill.

    Afterwards, we went to Infinity, Mama because there was an event there and our grandchildren from our nephews was one of the stalls there. We bought drinks to support them. Edgar also bought me a ballcap from the stalls there, Mama. Then we went home, although Ralph had a hard time booking a Grab car. It took him almost 30 minutes, I think. 

    I did not work today. I took my birthday leave before it gets forfeited. It was supposed to be taken on birth month, but since there were too many holidays in May, I asked if I can take it in June, instead and it was approved. To make the day useful, I used my leave to visit my doctor this afternoon for my quarterly check up. Of course, I took my lab test results, Mama.

    My doctor said my lab test results were okay, and my cholesterol level is ideal, not just within the safe range, but it is ideal said my doctor. Of course, I still have to continue maintenance medicines, and see him again after 3 months. Good thing my consultation of covered by my HMO, Mama.

    Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. I'm just waiting for Ralph to leave for work before I can go sleep, Mama.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Father's Day tomorrow

Dear Mama,

    It's Saturday night, only Edgar and I are at home. Ralph attended another quiz night event, and Angel is out with her co-workers. She is better now, Mama. She has completed her antibiotics. Hopefully she won't get sick again. They are still on graveyard shift.

    I got my lab results this morning, Mama. It's time again for my quarterly check up with my doctor. I will go to the doctor on Monday. I'm thankful my lab test results are okay, Mama. At least I think they're okay because they are all still within the safe range, Mama. Unless my doctor sees something that I don't know. I wish there'll be less medicines to take. I'm tired of these medications and check up, Mama.

    Tomorrow is Father's Day again, Mama. After Christmas, it's my least favorite occasion because it reminds me of how big a failure I am as a father. I'm sorry, Mama.

    Anyway, that's all for now. I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Angel did not work tonight

Dear Mama,

    Angel did not work tonight. She's sleeping right now. We already had our dinner, Mama. Edgar just arrived home. He had dinner outside. Probably it's related to his financial advisor hustle. Ralph is also sleeping. I will wake him up at 9 p.m., Mama so, he can get ready for work.

    Angel is still sick, Mama. That's why she did not work. It's better that she rest for now, instead of having an on-and-off fever. She'll take her antibiotic later at 10 p.m. Please make her well, Mama. She wanted to work, but her body needs to rest. I hope it won't affect her status in his company. She really wanted that job, Mama.

    That's all for now, Mama. Please hold my hands. I need you, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Sunday update

Dear Mama,

    It's another Sunday night, we just had our dinner. We did not go out today, Mama. We were supposed to, but Angel wasn't feeling well, so we just stayed at home. She's taking antibiotics again, Mama. Looks like her tonsils are again swelling which was causing her pain and fever. The antibiotics was prescribed by the doctor in their office, Mama. She was advised to see an EENT, which she did yesterday but the doctor was not around. She'll go back to the EENT next week, Mama.

    We don't have work tomorrow, Mama. It's a local holiday in Pampanga because it's the anniversary of the Pinatubo eruption. Edgar will work, though. They'll be operating in skeletal force and he's one of those who were picked to work. Ralph and Angel will also work tomorrow, Mama because their companies are following U.S. holidays.

    Nothing much is happening, Mama. It's June and it's time again for my quarterly check up with my doctor. It's getting tiresome, Mama. I am supposed to get my blood extraction again for the FBS and other laboratory tests that I need to bring to the doctor. I'm getting tired of this routine.

    Anyway, that's all for now, Mama. I wish to see you soon. I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                            Daddy

Update on Angel

Dear Mama,

    It's 9 p.m., Wednesday and Ralph is getting ready to go to work. Angel left earlier before 7 p.m., Mama. She's still not feeling well, but she's working because she can't afford to be absent since she's still a probationary and they are having their training, Mama. But she said she's feeling better when she left. Hopefully she'll really get well, Mama.

    I'll be waiting for Ralph to leave for work before I rest, because I need to lock the house. But I am already sleepy, Mama. He'll be leaving around 10 p.m. So, I still have to wait for about an hour.

    I really don't know what to say here. I just want to update you on Angel, Mama. Edgar is already in his room and resting. I guess, I should end my letter for now before I start whining again.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Angel's first night shift

 Dear Mama,

I am already in the office now. Angel came home before Edgar and I left work today, Mama. She came from her first night shift duty. She wasn't feeling well, Mama. She was complaining about her throat and she has slight fever. Although, she said yesterday she was not feeling well during day but she said she was okay to work. She said she'll work again tonight, Mama.

I'm worried. Please make her well, Mama.

I'm sorry, I'm asking you again.

                                        Daddy

Sunday night

Dear Mama,

    It's Sunday night, and we just had our dinner. Edgar cooked spaghetti for our dinner tonight, Mama. He also prepared salad to pair with the spaghetti. Both were delicious, Mama. He is really getting good in the kitchen.

    It's back to work tomorrow again, and it's also the first day of school, Mama. I'm sure there'll be heavy traffic tomorrow. It's also Angel's first day on the graveyard shift, Mama. Although she'll be leaving earlier than Ralph. Her shift starts at 8 p.m. while Ralph's starts at 10 p.m.

    I'm worried about my job security, Mama. I am not yet ready to retire. I don't have any savings, and I don't want to be a burden to our children. But I'm worried about our company. Our boss has been focusing too much on AI lately. I'm praying it won't jeopardize our job.

    Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. I might sleep early tonight. I hope I can see you in my dream.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

It's Friday night again

Dear Mama,

    It's past 6 p.m. and Ralph just left. He left early today, Mama. His shift won't start until 10 p.m. He must be meeting some of his friends again. It's just Edgar and I at the house now. Angel won't be out until 7 p.m. and I'm not sure if she'll go home straight tonight. It's their last day of day shift, Mama.

    It's Friday night again, and they will have singers at the grill house beside us, Mama. I hope that just like in previous weekends, they are not loud. I'm glad they did something to minimize the noise, Mama. Although I still hear them, and I have to control my anxiety because they are not as loud as the previous owners.

    I've been having an on-and-off fever, Mama. I'm not even sure if I'm really sick or it's just psychological because of this anxiety I've been having every time I am at home.

    I'm sorry, Mama. I wish you were here.

                                                                                                    Daddy

On sick leave today

Dear Mama,

    I did not go to work today, I took a sick leave today, Mama. I was actually feeling better earlier, but now I don't know. My back hurts, I feel weak, and I feel anxious, Mama.

    I am taking paracetamol. I guess the effect of the one I took earlier is already fading, Mama. If that's even the term for it. You know what I mean.

    I want to sleep, but I can't. I'm waiting for the garbage truck, Mama. Although I am not sure if they will come today. It's more than 2 weeks that our garbage have not been collected. Ralph and Angel must have been sleeping when they came previously. The garbage truck do not even knock on the houses, they just pass through. You'll be able to give your garbage only when you actually caught them coming. Otherwise, they will just pass quickly.

     Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. I'll try to shut my eyes for a while.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy