Happy Teacher's Day, Mama!

Dear Mama,

Happy Teacher's Day! You were one of the most dedicated teacher I ever knew. I'm sure, little angels up there in heaven are now very happy for having one of the best teachers who came to them.

I miss you, Mama. Take Care.

I love you.


Daddy

Hold my hands...

Hold my hands, Mama. Don't let me give up... please.

Help me be strong for the kids, Mama.

...

Dear Mama,

I don't know what I'm going to say to you right now. I want to quit, yet I know I can't. I am distracted right now, Mama. Too many things going  on now, both good and bad... and then worse.

There are still no results in the songwriting contest, Angel and I attended a scriptwriting workshop yesterday and now she wants to join in the short film making contest, I still haven't published my short story book yet and I do not know if I should still continue with it, and I am about to lose my job again. That is if I am going to quit.

Still not in the best of health right now Mama, physically, mentally, emotionally... and I believe I am also spiritually malnourished. Otherwise, I would not be as disturbed as I am right now. It's really hard going through all these things alone. I wish you're here by my side, Mama. So at least I can hold your hand, or hug you. That would make me feel better.

I'm tired, Mama. I can't always be that strong. I need you, Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

Good morning

Dear Mama,

Just want to say good morning. I'm feeling better now. I hope things turn out better too this day, and the rest of the week.

Angel is already in school, the two boys are still sleeping. Will be preparing for work in a while, Mama. Take care of yourself. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Was that vertigo?

Dear Mama,

When I woke up this morning, I felt dizzy when I tried to stand up. It seemed everything around me was moving. I thought I would passed out. It was just a few seconds, Mama. But it was painful. And all throughout the day, I felt it a couple of times, especially when I looked down or everytime I try to stand up from lying. It was the first that this happened to me, Mama. I went to bed early last night, and I was fine. I don't know what triggered it.

This afternoon, I went to the hospital to have my BP checked. I felt relieved that it was normal, although I was still puzzled. I also feel a little pain at the back of my neck, Mama. I thought I was just having a stiff neck because I can't look behind me without turning my whole body.

Right now, I feel fine although I still feel dizzy sometimes but not as painful as it was this morning. Maybe tomorrow I'll be better, Mama.

That will be all for now, Mama. Take care of yourself. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Going home after attending the workshop

Dear Mama,

I was able to attend the workshop today and went home without any hassle. The workshop was more of a symposium, actually. It wasn't interactive, aside from the crowd singing with Ryan Cayabyab. The finalists who made it the Philpop songwriting contest were also presented. Now, I know why I lost. They were good, Mama. I really do not stand a chance. If only I can play the guitar and sing better. Maybe I would have a chance.

Anyway, on my way home, while on bus... I suddenly felt a sting. I became sad. I imagine myself on the bus then, going home for the weekend after working five days in Makati. You were texting and asking were am I already and of course, telling me to take care. It was a nice and warm feeling. But this afternon, from Manila to Angeles, my phone was silent. All of a sudden, I felt the emptiness once more.

I don't know why. It was farthest from my mind. I guess I'm going through that episode again.

Well I better stop now before I start whining again. Take care of yourself, Mama. I miss you.

I love you, Mama.


Daddy

Songwriting workshop and senior citizen insinuation

Dear Mama,

I am very much excited for the songwriting workshop tomorrow. I will get to meet The Maestro, Ryan Cayabyab, who will be conducting the workshop. I hope I can make my time worthwhile. I mean, I hope I could reach out and really participate instead of just being so quiet at the back. I hope I can get something from the experience, and of course, I wish I can have the guts to ask Mr. Cayabyab for a photo opportunity. It would make the workshop participation complete, right Mama?

You know what, Mama? I bought medicine on my way home at Mercury Drugstore at the highway. I was surprised because the saleslady asked me I have a senior citizen card. I dismissed it at first and proceeded with my business. When I asked for vitamins, she asked me if I wanted the premium type, the one which is for 50 years old and above. Imagine that! Do I really look that old?! I know I already have white hairs, but they're not all white, Mama. How tactless can that saleslady be? She should be thankful I was not my grumpy old self.

Anyway, I guess it's inevitable. I know I'm growing old and I'll do it all alone... until I'll be with you once again, Mama. By then, growing old won't mean a thing to me anymore because I am with you once again. I miss you, Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

I feel sleepy

Dear Mama,

I feel sleepy. But I don't think this is just plain 'sleep.' It's just like the one I felt when you slapped my face because I needed to wake up. If ever Mama, please be there to meet me. Just in case I won't be able to fight it.

Take care, Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy