Your birthday cake

Dear Mama,

Happy birthday! Today, is officially your birthday! I woke the kids up at 5 a.m. so we can visit you early at La Pieta Mama. I think we were already already there before 6 a.m., it was still dark then. I was happy that I was able to bring the kids to you. I hope it made you happy Mama, and I really wish you can still appreciate the flowers I'm giving you.

From La Pieta, we went to have a quick breakfast because we don't want to be late for the mass at 8:30 a.m. We have requested that you to be included in the mass intentions Mama. It's the best I can do to celebrate your birthday.

After mass, we just went home to rest. Ralph has to go to the IHCC community because they have a practice.

Unlike last year where I cooked spaghetti and prepared fruit salad, I just bought everything to celebrate your birthday this year Mama. I went out in the afternoon to buy palabok and a cake. Angel requested for ice cream too.

Here's the birthday cake I bought for you Mama.


It's a mango cake Mama. I did not choose a chocolate cake this time, for a change.

At around 4 p.m., when Ralph already came home, we already sat at the dining table to celebrate your birthday. We said a little prayer, and of course, the kids and I sang happy birthday for you, Mama. Hope it made you happy.

I promise to continue celebrating your birthday year after year Mama, and I'll tell the kids to continue doing this even when I am gone.

Really wishing you can join us Mama... I miss you a lot.

'til my next letter Mama. Take care of yourself... and happy birthday again.

I love you Mama.


Daddy

Happy Birthday, Mama!

Dear Mama,

It's 10:30 PM. In less than two hours, it will be officially your birthday. Happy birthday, Mama! How I wish I can hug and kiss you on your birthday. I already made plans with the kids for your birthday, I just hope we can do them to celebrate your special day. I really wish you can join us Mama.

I guess you might already know our plans, but let's just say you don't, and I won't tell you now so we can surprise you. Let's just wait for your birthday, okay?

I miss you Mama, I really do... especially, on days like this one.

Take care of yourself Mama. Happy birthday!

I love you.

Daddy

Having a hard time adjusting...

Dear Mama,

I admit, right now I'm still having a hard time adjusting to my new schedule. I am still not use to following a routine Mama. It used to be that I own my time, but that is not possible now. That's why I'm always in a hurry every morning Mama, because I don't want to be late for work. And in the afternoon, I am again in a hurry to go home because I am worried about the kids.

This is really a big adjustment for all of us Mama. Ralph has to be more responsible now, Edgar needs to go home earlier that he used to, and Angel is being fetched from school by either Ate Tey or Nanay, instead of me.

Hopefully, I'm doing the right thing Mama, because this would help me provide for the kids. Please look after the kids while I'm at work Mama, I always worry about them.

That's all for now Mama, sorry for not writing for quite some time, I am not yet used to my schedule.

Take care of yourself Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

My first day of work

Dear Mama,

This afternoon I reported to my first day of work. When I went to my new job, I was surprised to see that the person I will be replacing was my classmate in college. I'm glad, because it will make the transition smoother Mama.

One problem though, Mama, was with the kids. I have to drop by at Sta. Teresita to pick them up. This is creating a big concern for me, Mama. It's making me think twice about the job, because I have to leave them and the time they'll be going home is the time that Ralph will be in school.

I hope I can solve this problem soon Mama.

That will be all for now Mama, I'll update you later.

Take care of yourself Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

I got hired

Dear Mama,

I am so excited to tell you this news. I got hired Mama! I received a call this afternoon, I got the job and I'm going to start tomorrow!

I'm both excited and nervous Mama. I hope I will do good, for the sake of the kids. I just wish that this time around, it will be a permanent job for me.

How I wish you're here Mama and share with me this excitement I'm feeling right now. I really miss you Mama.

Please take care of yourself. I'll update you later.

I love you Mama.


Daddy

No feedback yet

Dear Mama,

It's now Wednesday and I still haven't received any call nor feedback about the interview I had last week. I thought their requirement was urgent Mama, maybe I didn't make it again.

I don't know Mama, maybe it's because at the back of my mind, I really don't want to work. I know I don't want to Mama, but I need to. I need to work for the kid. Honestly, it's not that I really don't want to, it's just that it's been too long since I've work with a company.

Mama, how I wish I could your words of encouragement now. I just need them. If I could just even hug you or hold your hand, I know I'll feel better. I miss you Mama. I want to be with you soon.

Take care of yourself Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

I didn't not attend the reunion tonight

Dear Mama,

I was supposed to attend our high school reunion tonight. I have already talked to the kids and asked them if I can leave them to attend the event. They all said yes, and that I should not worry. Ralph is now feeling better Mama, and Edgar who had a slight fever in the morning was also well in the afternoon.

So I cooked their dinner in the afternoon, and told them to eat while I wash the utensils I used.

But as I was about to finish washing, I heard Ralph and Angel arguing again, with Angel almost shouting. Now, this really frustrates me Mama. How can I even attend the reunion, when I know I can't even leave the kids for a while?

Why are they always fighting Mama? What should I do so I can make them cooperate with each other? It looks like Ralph and Angel are having a hard time to co-exist. Am I such a bad father Mama? It's like I'm not teaching them anything.

In my frustration, I decided not to leave anymore Mama. I guess, I shouldn't really leave the kids all alone. I'm sorry for even planning to attend the event Mama.

If only you were, at least they would have a good role model, and perhaps they will treat each other better. I really wish you were here Mama... I do.

Take care of yourself Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

Catching up

Dear Mama,

I'm trying to catch up with my work. I have a lot I want to write, but I can't put anything into words Mama.

After Edgar got sick, it's Ralph's turn again. He didn't attend class last night because he's not feeling well. He started to get sick last Thursday, when Edgar was already fine. But this morning, it seems that Ralph is also fine. I hope it continues that way.

Everytime they got sick Mama, I asked myself what you were doing then while you were still here with us. Sometimes I ask the kids. Although these previous illness were new to us, so I was just praying and hoping you'll drop by to help us.

What am I saying? I'm sorry Mama, I know you need to rest. It's just...

I'll guess I need to stop now, lest I go there again. Take care of yourself Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

Ate Let, Koya Boy. Edgar, and my interview

Dear Mama,

Koya Boy already left for Guam last Sunday, while Ate Let went home for Canada last night.

Edgar is sick again. He said he is having difficulty of breathing. He said, he is ready to go to school tomorrow. I hope he'll be okay Mama.

Tomorrow, I'll have another job interview in Clark Mama. I really don't know what my chances, or if I even want to get hired. But they said I should find real work. I guess, I have to think of the children's sake Mama. So wish me luck.

Goodnight Mama. I hope I'll see you in my dreams.

I miss you Mama. I love you.


Daddy

Please hold my hand...

Dear Mama,

Please hold my hand... I need to Mama... please...

Finding work for me

Dear Mama,

Dadz has been busy lately contacting his friends. He's trying to find work for me Mama. He is calling all his friends and former co-workers from CDC asking them to help me. As you know, last year, the person they called to help me did nothing Mama. Ironically, they helped him then when he was needing work.

Anyway, I'm really not sure if I could get hired. I'm 41 now, and I was having a hard time when I was even younger. They will leave on Tuesday, so all Dadz can do now is asked his friends.

I don't know if I won't be given that overqualified/over-age treatment again Mama. I'm not even sure if I want to work again, or even apply for work again.

They said I need to work. Perhaps they know better than me Mama. I don't know.

Take care of yourself now Mama. I will be with you soon.

I miss you Mama. I love you.


Daddy

Tatay was finally laid to rest

Dear Mama,

I was planning to write about this last night, I don't know why, but I haven't gotten into it. I just want to tell you Mama that Tatay was finally laid to rest yesterday. But I'm sure you may already know it by now.

Kuya Boy will be staying here until Tatay's 9th day, and he'll fly back the next day. Ate Let and Dadz, I believe will flying on the following day after that.

Edgar and Angel are back to school now. Ralph won't be having his class until Monday. He's sick now Mama, he has fever. I don't know how he got it, he was just fine yesterday before we left home for the burial. Anyway, I've already given him medicine Mama. But please, help me take care of Ralph, Mama.

That's about it for now Mama. Please take care of yourself.

I miss you Mama. I love you.


Daddy