I feel guilty...

Dear Mama,

I really feel guilty right now. Since last night, I've trying to psyche myself to go to Mang Salud's wake in Sapang Maisac. I'm sure you know the reason why I'm having a hard time convincing myself to go. I know she has nothing to do with my reason, that's why I feel guilty for not having to pay my last respect to someone so close to you.

I'm really sorry Mama, I know my action can't be justified. I guess I will just have to carry the guilt, it's a choice that I made. I told Angel of my hesitation to go and she understands me. Still not enough reason to release me of this anxiety.

If she's with you right now, please tell her I'm sorry. I know, she too understands the reason. I will always pray for her as I always pray for you. In the meantime, I will just carry on this self-inflicted guilt that I have.

Again Mama, I'm sorry. Please take care of yourself. I love you.



Daddy



P.S. How I wish I was communicating to you this much when you were still here. I miss you Mama.