I miss you Mama

Dear Mama,

Hello. Are you surprised you're getting more letters from me lately? Maybe it's because I am in front of the computer most of the time now Mama, trying to write as much as I can so I can earn enough for the kids... and also to keep myself busy.

I wish I was talking as often like this with you when you were still here Mama, instead of just worrying then how you were feeling or where we're going to get the money for your next dialysis.

But of course, there's really nothing we can do now. I can only reach you through this blog... and I can only believe that you are reading my letters... really.

I miss you Mama. I don't say it as often lately, but I do, I really miss you. Every success, every failures, every good news or bad news, every jokes that I hear, I was hoping that I can share them all with you.

Why do we have to be this way Mama? We were kind and obedient, we did everything that we think was right, we even served in the church... and this is the reward that we got?

I'm sorry Mama, I know I really should not be talking like this anymore, but I just have to let it out of my system. I'm really sorry.

Going back to work now Mama, excuse this little episode. I'll avoid these emotions as much as I can. Take care of yourself Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Aren't you proud of me?

Dear Mama,

I did it! I was able to raise the money for Angel's tuition fee for the 2nd grading period. Aren't you proud of me, Mama? I just need to work some more now so I can earn excess money for our daily expenses as well as other debts.

After that, I'll be working again for Ralph's enrollment which will be due perhaps mid or last week of October. I don't want to ask for more help from Ate Let Mama, I want to earn the money for their tuition fee by myself. It's hard because there aren't too many writing opportunities lately. I hope it gets better soon.

I can say we are lucky Mama, because we were spared from the damage brought by Ondoy, unfortunately there are so many who were affected by it. I was even surprised that there was also a landslide in Arayat and families were affected. Help me pray for them Mama.

Will be gathering some of our old clothes and see where I can bring them. I know, Angel's school would also have campaign drive for the victims. I'd like to donate some more Mama, so I'm working for it too.

That's all for now Mama. Don't worry about us, we're safe. Do take care of yourself.

I miss you Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Strong winds last night

Dear Mama,

I was not able to work yesterday, we don't have power from 3PM until evening. The wind was so strong Mama, I'm just glad the kids were all here safe otherwise I would be sick just worrying about them.

The power came back at around 11PM, but by that time I was already sleepy to do anything Mama. So I decided to start early today. I hope I can do more so I can make up for the lost opportunities yesterday. Hopefully, the weather would be normal today Mama.

That's all for now Mama. Take care of yourself. Please continue watching the kids especially when they're not with me.

I miss you Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

I scolded Angel the other day

Dear Mama,

I meant to write this to you last Wednesday. I scolded Angel on that day after we arrived home from school. She irritated me Mama with her inconsistent answers, she was lying to me and she made me look like I'm dumb.

What's worse Mama, is that all throughout, she wasn't remorseful, even defending herself. Of course, she never said sorry Mama. I really don't know how to correct that.

That's all I can say now Mama. Please pray for me, that I won't be losing my eyesight anytime soon. I can't see well anymore Mama, but there's nothing I can do, my work is on the Internet.

Take care of yourself Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

Ralph's finals

Dear Mama,

Yesterday, I was able to pay Ralph's tuition fee for the Finals, although I wasn't really proud of it this time Mama because I asked for financial assistance from Ate Let. Ralph and Angel's tuition are due at almost the same time, and I can't raise enough for both of them. Actually, I still don't have enough for Angel's tuition fee Mama, but I'm working on it. It will due next week.

Last Saturday, we went out to watch the free concert at Nepo Quadrangle Mama. I wanted the kids to enjoy, I know they will like because they like all the bands who'll be performing. Unfortunately, there was rain and we haven't been able to watch it well. I was also disappointed Mama, because they sell liquors to minors, which was required to get a ticket.

Anyway, it's almost Christmas Mama and I'm excited for the kids. But before that, it'll your birthday first. Of course, we're going to celebrate it like we did last year Mama. I'm still thinking what to do.

That'll all for now Mama. Please take care of yourself. I miss you Mama.

I love you.



Daddy

How are you?

Dear Mama,

I can't believe I haven't written anything to you for quite some time now. I'm sorry about that Mama. I just don't have anything to write and I don't want to bore you. I've been focusing on my 'work' now Mama, Ralph's Finals and Angel's 2nd grading period are coming soon and at almost the same time at that. That's why I have to work hard.

I'm getting always sleepy again lately Mama, I hope there's nothing wrong with me. Sometimes I push myself to work so I could earn more. I'm talking paracetamol like I'm taking candy Mama. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't.

Anyway, like I said, I haven't much to say except that I miss you Mama. I wish I can be with you. Take of yourself.

I love you Mama.



Daddy

Ralph's birthday and Angel will be going home alone today

Dear Mama,

Ralph went home at past midnight yesterday. I just let him be, it was his birthday. He went out with some of his classmates. He told me they drank Red Horse because somebody offered to treat them. They have only met the guy at the place where they went, I haven't asked him where it was yet. I'm just glad he was able to go home safe. At least he was able to celebrate his birthday.

Angel will be going home at 2PM today. She asked me not to pick her up from school today because she'll be going home with her friend Carmela. She lives just 2 blocks aways from us Mama, so I allowed her. I told her to be careful.

I always feel sleepy again lately Mama. I don't why. This has stopped a few days ago, and now it's coming back. I hope it's nothing serious.

Take care of yourself Mama. That will be all for now.

I miss you Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

It's almost Ralph's birthday...

Dear Mama,

In less than 2 hours Ralph will be 17. He is still awake, he said he'll wait for his birthday. He is now playing with his new cell phone. I bought him a new cell phone for his birthday gift this afternoon Mama. All of us went to SM this afternoon so we can buy the cell phone and to have a little celebration for his birthday.

I know, we could have used the money for other things, but if I didn't buy him now I may never get to buy him anymore. Besides, I've really worked hard for those money Mama, so I can buy him a new cell phone. His old unit is already malfunctioning. I just hope he takes care of it Mama.

We were able to have a simple dinner at a fastfood before we left. Practically, we just roamed around the mall. Aside from buying the new cell phone and eating, we really didn't do anything else Mama. That's only as far as our money can take us. I hope the kids can appreciate it. How I wish you could be with us Mama.

That's all for now Mama. I haven't written anything yet. I don't know if I can still write now, it's already 10:40 PM and my eyes are almost closing. Take care of yourself Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

I feel cold...

Dear Mama,

I just woke up from an afternoon nap. It was good. But I feel cold now Mama, and my back aches. Is this a sign of old age Mama? I hope I'm not having any symptoms of any disease or sickness... I can't afford to be sick now Mama. I have a lot of work to do.

Ralph, by the way, is not yet home. He went out with his classmates today (Saturday). He said one of his classmates is going to treat them. It's his classmate's birthday. On Monday, it will be Ralph's birthday... I wonder if he would return the favor Mama. I'm planning to buy him a new cellphone for his birthday.

That's all for now Mama. Take care of yourself.

I wish you were here... I miss you Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Angel is in the Top 10

Dear Mama,

Sorry I haven't been writing lately. I was trying to earn more for Ralph's birthday on Monday. I promised I would buy him a new cell phone. I want to fulfill that promise to him Mama.

Angel just got her class card now, and you now what Mama? She is included in the Top 10! She is ranked no. 8 Mama! And to think that she was always complaining, I'm glad she was still able to get a spot in the Top 10.

I told her she can improve it next grading Mama... I know she can. But I'm not pressuring her though.

Edgar, on the other hand, has 70's in his grades again Mama. If I'm not mistaken, his two subjects got 76 or 77, and one of them is Values! He said he wasn't able to pass a requirement because he was sick when it was due, when he reported to class, the teacher said the grades were already computed. I said he should improve his grades. We don't want to be looking for another school on his senior year in high school.

That's all for now. Will be getting prepared for dinner a little later, although honestly, I still don't know what to serve them this time. I hope I can think of something fast.

Take care of yourself Mama. I miss you.

I love you.


Daddy

We have a new dog....

Dear Mama,

We have a new dog. His name is Benz. Angel saw him on the street while we were on our way to school. I promised her I will take the dog home on my way back... which I did Mama.

Now, the new dog is at home, and he seemed to like Ralph. I hope he likes Angel too when she arrived this afternoon. I still don't know how Chuchi, our existing pet, will react to him Mama. She hasn't seen him yet, but I know she can smell him.

He's so cute Mama, and so fragile too. That's why I agreed to take him home. I hope we can take good care of him... and that the kids would learn to be responsible too.

That's all for now Mama. Take care of yourself. I miss you Mama.

I love you.


Daddy

Ralph got through me again Mama

Dear Mama,

Ralph got through me again. I scolded him again this morning Mama. He came home late last night when he was supposed to come home early. We waited for him so we can all have dinner together. I even cooked the soup late so that it will still be hot when he comes home... but he didn't come home early Mama, that's why I was furious.

I tried to text him to at least know what he's up to, but he never replied. Why is he like that Mama? How can I teach him to be considerate of others? Angel and Edgar were already hungry but I told them to wait for Ralph.

Did I raise him wrongly Mama? Am I not a good father to him? Please help me Mama, I really don't want arguing with him anymore. I know he's a good boy but he's too easy to influence. He easily follows everything that his classmate tells him, and it seems he's not even thinking.

What should I do Mama? I tried talking to him about this already, I don't know what to do. How I wish you were here Mama... how I wish.


Daddy

It's September

Dear Mama,

It's already September, and you know that when the 'ber' months arrive it also means Christmas is fast approaching. I'm excited for this year Mama, excited for the kids. I hope I can make it a great Christmas for them. Last year wasn't much of a holiday, I will make it up for them this year Mama, I promise.

But before Christmas, it will be Ralph's birthday in less than two weeks Mama. I'm working hard so I can buy him a new cell phone, his old one really needs to be changed. Yes Mama, I'll work hard to afford that gift for him, after all I believe he deserve it.

Then after his birthday, it will be your birthday again in November, and we will celebrate it again Mama, and make you happy and proud of us. I will always make your birthday a special day for us Mama... I will.

That's all for now Mama. Take care of yourself now. I really miss you Mama.

I love you.


Daddy