Friday

Dear Mama,

    We came home tonight at around 8:30 p.m., the kids and I. It's Friday and we went to the mall, Mama. We had our dinner there, courtesy of Ralph. And then we had coffee, courtesy of Edgar. It's sort of something we had been doing for the last couple of Fridays, Mama.

    It wasn't really intentional, Mama. Sometimes I would send them a message in our group chat that I won't go straight home after work. I'd say I'd to SM Clark or Nepo Mall in Angeles, since it's Friday and I can do the laundry tomorrow morning. And then they would meet me wherever I might be.

    Next Friday will be your birthday, Mama. Although the kids and I might not be able to celebrate because they will attending the birthday of their niece who has the same birthday as you, Mama. You and your granddaughter share the same birthday, Mama. I'm not sure though if we're going to go out to celebrate on Saturday, Mama. 

    That will be all for now, Mama. I hope I can come up with something so we can celebrate your birthday next week.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy 

Finally!

Dear Mama,

    Finally! Ralph received a job offer! After more than a month of sending applications and attending interviews left and right, Ralph finally received a job offer, Mama. It was the one I mentioned in my previous letter. They already got the necessary number of character reference replies, which was the requirement for Ralph's confirmation. He'll be starting on December 2nd, Mama.

    As for me, I won't be getting anything this year. Unfortunately, it's too late for me to look for another job. I don't want to start again. I'll just wait for my retirement.

    Edgar did not go to work today. He was not feeling well. He was tired when he came home last night. He had a slight fever, Mama. He's okay now. He's already preparing our dinner.

    Angel is out now. She went out at around 6:00 p.m. Hopefully she'll be home soon. It's almost dinnertime. 

    That's all the update for now, Mama. Please continue guiding and praying for our children.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                Daddy

Sunday update

Dear Mama,

    It's Sunday afternoon now. We had our lunch earlier. Of course, it was prepared by Edgar. It was pork and squash stewed in coconut milk, Mama. It was delicious.

    Pampanga is already under storm signal no. 3, Mama. Although there isn't much rain now, but the weather is gloomy. Edgar is preparing to leave. I hope there won't be any strong rains later. Angel is sleeping now, while Ralph is in his room.

    Ralph already received a job offer, Mama. Thank you for praying for him. He's just waiting for one more confirmation, which he hopes to get by this coming week, and he will start on the 2nd of December. The only thing is that it will be onsite, Mama. It's also on graveyard shift, which he is already used to, anyway.

    As for me, nothing's new, Mama. Still in my job, not much happening. I'm just waiting for my retirement age. I don't see any opportunity anytime soon. I've also stopped attending Toastmasters. I can't remember if I've already mentioned that in my previous letters. I guess I'm really getting old, Mama.

    I guess, that will all for now, Mama. I wish you were here. I really miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                            Daddy

Alone on a Saturday

Dear Mama,

    I'm alone at home right now, and it's 10 a.m. Our children just left to attend the baptism of their niece, Mylene's daughter, in Friendship. They'll be back home maybe later this afternoon.

    I planned a lot of things to do for today like cleaning and tidying up the house. But right now, I feel lazy, and I haven't done anything. Yes, Mama. I'm procrastinating again.

    I got a lot of things on my mind right now, Mama. I'm overwhelmed. I don't how we'll be able to recover financially. Ralph is still not hired yet. Also, Angel doesn't have a job yet, and she's not actively looking for any, unfortunately.

    I'm lost, Mama.

    I wish you were here.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Edgar's kitchen adventures

Dear Mama,

    Our son Edgar is really taking up after you in the kitchen. He has really taken over the kitchen from me, Mama. In fact, every time he is not around, I don't even know what to do in the kitchen anymore.

    Today, for our lunch, Edgar cooked sisig. It's his first time to cook sisig, Mama. It wasn't bad, to think he lacked some ingredients, like liver. But it was okay. He prepared sisig because last night I was asking if we can buy any decent sisig here in Marisol. So, he just bought some pork and other ingredients when we went grocery shopping this morning.

    For our dinner, he prepared crispy enoki mushroom, Mama. Aside from the luncheon meat and pipino salad he prepared. He has a lot dishes he can prepare already, Mama. Like kare-kare, lomi, palabok, and more. He is really expanding his kitchen knowledge, Mama.

    He really took after you, Mama.

    Meanwhile, Ralph is still waiting for that job that would finally hire him. He is getting a lot of interviews left and right, but nothing materialized yet. Hopefully, this week something good will happen.

    Angel is still looking for a job, Mama. She hasn't applied to anything yet. Aside from iQor, from where she's waiting for a call, which did come until now. She applied more than 2 weeks ago.

    Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. Please continue guiding us.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Back to the gutter

Dear Mama,

    It's Sunday, October 27, and still 3 days before payday. I am down to my last P100 in my wallet, Mama which I will use later to buy cat food. Good thing I just walk to and from work, Mama. Hopefully it won't rain tomorrow, although there's another typhoon coming in today, if it hasn't entered the PAR yet.

    Angel is on her way to the vet, she was asking for money to pay for the Grab. Unfortunately, as I've said I'm down to my last 100 which is already reserved for the cat. Ralph will again pay for the consultation to the vet, which he will pay later via GCash.

    It's Ate Tey's birthday today, and there'll be dinner  later at Sta. Teresita. We'll go there, although I won't have anything to give to Ate Tey. I'll just say I'll give it to her on payday. I am not sure though if Angel will be coming with us later, Mama. You know how she always avoids coming with us on occasions like this. It doesn't matter which family side it is.

    I don't know how I will be able to recover financially, Mama. It's like I'm back in the gutter. I don't want to burden Ralph, especially now that he is in-between jobs. I hope things will be better for us soon.

    Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you, Mama

                                                                                                Daddy

Rainy days

Dear Mama,

    It's raining right now, there's a typhoon and they named it Kristine. I think we are under Signal no. 2 right now, Mama. It's Thursday, and tomorrow, Friday is Fiestang Apu and also the Tigtikan Terakan King Dalan (TTKD). But it's raining and it might probably rain until tomorrow, or Saturday. There's a possibility the TTKD will be rained on.

    Angel is out right now, Mama. She went with her cousins from your side of the family. It's her first time to be with them alone. I'm glad they invited her, because Angel needs to go out. She only goes out when we go out, Mama. She still hasn't found a job yet, although she's actively applying.

    Ralph still hasn't been hired yet. He's been going through a lot interviews but nothing has materialized from those interviews yet. I really hope he gets hired soon. I know that feeling of being jobless. Good thing he is more psychologically and mentally healthier than me, Mama. But I do pray he gets a job soon.

    Edgar seems to be doing fine in his present job right now, or he's just making good use of his time there. If he might be looking for other opportunity, he's not actively pursuing it right now. Sometimes he says he wants to grow with the company, Mama.

    Me? Still in limbo. Trying my best to make both ends meet, and my debts are piling up again, Mama. And yes, still getting those anxiety attacks from everything I hear in my environment.

    Anyway, that will be all for now, Mama. I hope I can hug you right now. I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Losing sight, figuratively speaking

Dear Mama,

    I'm almost losing sight of everything, figuratively speaking. Although my eyesight isn't really that good either.

    I don't know what's happening, Mama. It seems like I'm losing hope of everything and I'm just dragging myself day in and day out. There is nothing good happening to us lately, Mama.

    Financially, I am depleted. I am not even living paycheck to paycheck, Mama because I am always having a deficit. And every period is bigger that the last one, thus  I feel my financial woes accumulating.

    Physically, I don't know. I get tired easily. I get irritated easily. I don't know, Mama. It's like I'm getting back to my old self, or perhaps even worse.

    I have also disconnected from almost everything - Toastmasters, batchmates, friends, companions. I no longer want to be associated with anything.

    I don't know, Mama. I've lost zest. I've lost my drive. And it's the longest I've felt like this. I don't know if I can still recover.

    I'm sorry, Mama. I wish you were here.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Home alone

Dear Mama,

    I am home alone right now. The kids went to attend the baptismal of their niece. It will be in Manila and they will  be there overnight. They'll be back home tomorrow, afternoon or early evening most probably, Mama.

    I will just be cleaning up the laundry basket until tomorrow, Mama. Hopefully, that is.

    Nothing much to say. I don't have any plans, I might go out for coffee, or I might just sleep in early, Mama.

    That will be all for now, Mama. 

    I miss you. I love you, Mama.

        

                                                                                                    Daddy

Happy Teacher's Day!

Dear Mama,

    Happy Teacher's Day!

    If you were only here, I know you will be celebrated by a lot of students who love you. That's because you were such a good and kind teacher, Mama. Even to this day, when a former student of yours would recognize me, or would learn that I am your husband, they would approach me and they only have good words for you. Probably, you are now teaching little cherubim in heaven, Mama. 

    I wish you were here, Mama.

    Ralph still hasn't found a new job, but he's searching, Mama. He is applying left and right, and have attended a lot of interviews already. Hopefully he'll find a company that not only will pay him well, but will help him grow and succeed professionally.

    I really wanted to say a lot, Mama. But it's your day. I don't want to ruin it. Happy Teacher's Day, Mama!

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Movie time with kids

Dear Mama,

    The kids and I watched a movie tonight. The movie was not really in our plans, Mama. We just went to SM Clark so they can buy gifts they will give for the Christening of their niece next week. I actually asked them to do it today because we received a bad news last night. Ralph was dismissed from his company with the reason being redundancy. He is looking for a new job now, Mama.

    I invited them to go out so we could forget about this bad news. I, too, am feeling a bit down lately, Mama.

    I hope things will get better for us soon.

    I wish I can hug you right now, Mama.

    I need you.

                                                                                                Daddy

We visited Kong Berning

Dear Mama,

    Ralph, Edgar, and I visited the wake of Kong Berning last night. Angel was supposed to go with us, but she wasn't feeling well, so she opted to stay at home. From the incomplete stories I gathered, it seems Kong Berning had a heart attack, Mama.

    Ralph and Edgar met their cousins, and also a few of their uncles and aunties, Mama. I was looking for the old folks so I can pay my respect to them, but it seems we are the old folks now. Tang Badong, I was told, passed away already last year. He was the last one from Ima's family. I was not able to ask from the side of Tatang's family.

    I went to the my doctor today, Mama, for my quarterly check up. He said my lab test results are good, and even my BP is normal. He advised me to continue with my maintenance medicines, Mama. He also added Vitamin B complex in my prescriptions.

    Ralph and I will be back at wake on Friday, Mama. I'm not sure if Edgar and Angel will come with us. The interment will be on Sunday.

    I guess that will be all for now, Mama. I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                Daddy

Ralph's birthday

Dear Mama,

    Yesterday we celebrated Ralph's birthday. He turned 32 yesterday, Mama. We celebrated by watching a stand up comedy show because he likes watching those, Mama. We enjoyed the show, Mama. We were laughing all throughout. There were about 7 or 8 stand up comedians who delivered their skits, all with different style. I was thinking, I could do that, Mama.

    The show lasted until past midnight because they started late, at around 9:30 p.m. We reached home at around 1:00 a.m. already. Then we took his birthday cake from the ref and sang happy birthday for him, Mama. It was already past 2:00 a.m. when we rested. Tiring, but it's okay. Ralph was happy. The children were all happy, Mama.

    We also received news yesterday that Kong Berning passed away, Mama. We were supposed to go to the wake tonight, but when I was telling Ralph to get prepared he said he doesn't feel well. So, I opted for him to get a rest instead. We'll just go tomorrow. Probably he got tired last night because the place was crowded and quite small. He might have gotten some airborne virus that affected him again. I hope he'll be okay. Please pray for him, Mama. Touch him and make him well.

    That's all for now, Mama. Still wishing you were still with us. I'm sure you would have enjoyed the show last night. I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                       Daddy

It must be the weather

Dear Mama,

    For the last few days, it feels like I am going down with a fever or flu, especially every night. I feel cold, I feel weak, and my back aches. I am not sure if these are real or just in my mind, Mama. I've been so down lately. It feels like I almost want to give up. I feel tired, Mama.

    On Saturday, it will be Ralph's birthday. That's just 2 days from now, Mama. Our eldest will be turning 32 already. I am really getting old, Mama. Actually, I feel old. We will be celebrating on Saturday. Unfortunately, I have no money to buy any gift for Ralph, Mama. 

    Lately, it feels like I've been failing again, Mama.

    Where did I go wrong?

                                                                                                        Daddy

Home

Dear Mama,

We are finally home, Ralph and I. We were discharged this afternoon, or should I say yesterday because it's past 12 midnight now. He is better now, Mama. His BP is going back to normal, although he is still getting occasional 130 and 140.

I hope things get better for us, Mama.

I wish you were here.

Daddy 

P. S. I love you.

Back at the hospital

Dear Mama,

     We are back at the hospital. Ralph was admitted again because of fever and infection.

     I'm really sorry, Mama.

     I think I'm losing it.

                                                      Daddy 

September

Dear Mama,

    September is not starting good for us. Although we went out last Sunday, the 1st of September, for coffee and dinner in the hope that it will bring better vibrations for us.

    Last night, however, just the second day of September, Ralph got sick. He has fever, and although he was trying not to show it to me when I left for work this morning, I felt he was weak, Mama.

    I'm not sure if it's the weather or his condition. He was already feeling cold when we left the house last Sunday. And since Sunday evening, it has been raining. Although it wasn't really that strong, it was continuous, Mama. And the wind was also blowing strong.

    He was working when I left home this morning, Mama. He was already in his computer, as he is on remote-work set up. Which was actually a good thing because he can't go out.

    Please make him well, Mama. I'm sorry he got sick again.

    We are already out of money from a lot of expenses on the cats, especially Ralph who spent the most for them. I cannot help him because I am already depleted and I'm just making ends meet through borrowed funds.

    I'm sorry I'm telling you this, Mama. I'll end my letter now.

    I'm sorry for everything, Mama.

                                                                                                    Daddy

Last day of August

Dear Mama,

    Just finished with our Toastmasters meeting, it's around 8:30 p.m. Ralph is still out, Mama. He went out with his friends. It was supposed to be last Sunday, but they were not able to push through because Ralph got sick then, he was not able to stand. That's why they reset it tonight.

    It's the last day of August, Mama. Hopefully, September will be better for us - physically, mentally, and financially. August took a lot from us. I thought we'll never make it through. Yes, we did, but not really victorious. I've never felt more defeated. Ironic, considering I've finally won in a speech contest this month.

    Edgar was also sick today, Mama. It started yesterday, actually. He said he feels acidic. Was that acid reflux? We went out for coffee last, Ralph, Angel, and I. Edgar was not able to come with us because of his condition. He was better midday today, but he still feels the acid in his stomach, Mama.

    I don't know what else to say. Please continue guiding us, Mama. Please visit me soon.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                    Daddy

May August end brings all the bad luck with it

Dear Mama,

    It has been a turbulent month, this August. We've been through a lot of rollercoaster rides, Mama. I am hoping September brings better days for us, especially it being the birth month of Ralph.

    I don't really know what to say, Mama.

    Last night I joined a benefit gig to raise funds for the baby of one of our fellow members in our songwriters club who is in the hospital. It was a last minute invitation, good thing I have already excused myself from our Toastmasters meeting. All 3 kids went with me, Mama.

    Ralph went to his doctor yesterday. He was given more medicines for maintenance, and they're quite expensive, Mama. He bought them  today and his total payments reached P3,500. And this will be his monthly expenses for his maintenance, Mama. I wish I can help him, but I am currently financially depleted right now. I hope we can find more sources of income.

    I guess that will be all for now, Mama.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

Update on Ralph's condition

Dear Mama,

    Yesterday evening, Ralph was able to stand up and walk. He joined us at the table for dinner. He was still feeling some pain in his thighs, Mama, and was still slow in moving. This morning, he was a lot better. He is more mobile now, Mama. Although there is still some pain.

    We're still not sure if it was a side effect of his medicines, electrolyte imbalance as mentioned by medical friends from the medical world, the food we ate last Saturday evening, or a combination of all those, including Ralph's condition.

    He will have to wait for Wednesday, August 28, which is his scheduled follow up with the doctor. We tried to reach the doctor's secretary since yesterday but we haven't received any reply until now. Although it's understandable because yesterday was Sunday, and today is a holiday.

    I hope his condition will get better until tomorrow because Edgar and I will have to go back to work, Mama. 

    I'm really sorry for everything, Mama.

                                                                                            Daddy

 

Side effect of Ralph's medicine

Dear Mama,

    Ralph was not able to stand up this morning. His feet cannot carry him. He can feel them but he cannot stand up, Mama. He was fine when we were still at the mall yesterday. This morning, he fell down when he tried to stand up.

    We think it was a side effect of his medicines for his BP, Mama. I asked Angel to search for all the side effect of his medicines, and he found one of his medicines affecting the muscles. It was not mentioned to us by the doctor when they gave us the medicine prescriptions when we were discharged, Mama.

     I am worried about Ralph, Mama.

                                                                                                Daddy

Rocky crossed the rainbow bridge

Dear Mama,

    I just told you about the cats yesterday, this afternoon we received new from the vet that Rocky crossed the rainbow bridge. He was my favorite among the cats and kittens, Mama. I refer to him as the lone wolf because he was alone, and so tiny, when we first saw him. He was always running on the street and would always run away from us. He stayed in the garage when he saw there were other kittens here, too. But we still could not approach him.

    I thought he was healthy, Mama. The kids took him to the vet last week because he was not as active as he used to be. They confined him, apparently he was sick. I did not understand, Mama. The kids were telling me about their conditions. But I don't know why my brain could not process it, or would not accept it.

    We have already lost 7 kittens, Mama. Rocky being the latest. Sometimes I think if we did not take care of them and just let them on the street, they might have survived. I don't know, Mama.

    By the way, Ralph is still under medications. He'll go back to the doctor for consultation and follow up next week. 

    I'm tired, Mama. I want to rest.

                                                                                                            Daddy

About the cats

Dear Mama,

    I don't know if I have told you about the cats in my previous letters. The kids have adopted the cats that came to our house since early this year. It started from one cat, then a mama cat with 6 kittens came. Then another lone kitten sought refuge in our house. Then a black cat came and gave birth to 2 kittens here. Although one died. 2 kittens from the first 6 were lost, probably stolen by some passersby. Then another cat, a mixed black-orange came cat alone, then came back after a few days with her 4 kittens.

    Sadly, a lot of the kittens have already died, Mama. From the first 6 kittens, only 1 kitten remains and he's in the vet now. The lone kitten is also in the vet now. From the 4 kittens of the black-orange cat, only 1 is alive and he's also in the vet. The kittens - Lulu (from the first 6), Rocky (the lone kitten), and Otis (from the black-orange cat) are all confined at the vet.

    Ralph has already spent a lot of money for these kittens, Mama. He is trying to save them. Most of those who died have expired while at the vet. Perhaps they have been taken there too late.

    I'm not sure if we are doing the right thing, Mama. We already have too many expenses, and these kittens have added to those. I hope all the efforts of the children will be worth it, Mama. I hope the remaining kittens live.

    I'm not even sure what to think about this. I am worried about the kittens, but I am also worried about Ralph's finances. I try to help, which isn't much because I too am financially drained. In fact, I only borrow money just to help Ralph, Mama. He has already spent a lot.

    Please tell me what to do, Mama. I am worried, concerned, and anxious of everything that is happening to us now. 

    I wish you were here. I don't know what to do.

    

                                                                                        Daddy

Home now

Dear Mama,

    Ralph and I are at home now. He was discharged today, Mama, on our 3rd day. He will be going back to the doctor next week for his follow up. His breathing has improved. The doctor said there's no more hissing and his lungs are now clear, or at least open.

    But as I have mentioned before, Mama, his BP has been constantly 140 and up. He is prescribed to take maintenance medicines for his BP. I feel he is too young for that. I hope he would seek second opinion, or at least the medicine would be removed once his BP stabilized.

    I've nothing much to say, Mama. I'm really sorry I wasn't able to take care of our children well. If only you were here, they will be taken care of better.

    I'm really sorry, Mama.

                                                                                                        Daddy

 

Day 2 update

Dear Mama,

It's our 2nd night here at the hospital. It's 8:30 pm now. Edgar and Angel already went home.  They were here earlier, Mama. 

During the doctor's visit this morning, she said we might stay 2 more days here. Ralph has been declared with hypertension.  His BP never go below 140, Mama. Although he wasn't feeling anything. The doctor also said he has pneumonia. He is breathing normally now, Mama. Although he still has his oxygen.

I'm really sorry this happened, Mama.

Daddy

I won, but...

Dear Mama,

As I've said in my previous letter, I joined the Tagalog speech contest yesterday. I joined all 4 categories, and I got a place in all of them, Mama.

I got 3rd place in Table Topics, 2nd Place in Evaluation and Humorous Speech, and I was the champion in the International Speech category, Mama.

I was hoping you'd be proud of me, Mama... but Ralph got admitted in the hospital today due to difficulty in breathing. We are in the hospital now, and I'm writing my letter here.

We went to PRI Medical Center in Pampang, instead of AUFMC which is nearer to us. Ralph thought it would be better here, because in our previous experiences in AUFMC, they were always full.

I thought they'll just administer oxygen and medicines to normalize his breathing, Mama. But he has pleghm showing in his x-ray and he also has a high BP.  So, he is under monitor now. They are trying to clear the pleghm and also maintain his BP. 

I'm afraid they might prescribed him to take maintenance for BP after this.

I'm sorry, Mama. I failed you again.

Daddy 

One more try

Dear Mama,

    I will be joining another speech contest tomorrow. It will the Tagalog speech contest and it will be my 3rd time joining it. I am not sure what the outcome will be, but I am doing my best, Mama.

    But first, I need to get to the event on time. I am travelling alone, Mama. I hope I won't get lost or get disoriented. Then after the event which might be around 7pm already, I hope I will be able to get home safely from Quezon City. 

    Wish me luck me, Mama. Both on the contest and on my travel haha...

    I hope I will make you proud tomorrow.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

Sick

Dear Mama,

    I feel sick. I feel so cold, Mama and it's afternoon here right now. I got rained on earlier when I was looking for a cat food store along the highway.

    I have already taken paracetamol, Mama. I wish I could take the leave tomorrow, unfortunately they would require us to submit medical certificate if we take a sick leave on a Monday, Friday, or the day before and after a holiday. Even if it's just one day. It's one of the things I don't like in my job, because it doesn't make sense.

    There were a lot of times I reported to work on a Monday or Friday even though I was not feeling well because of this policy. To think I rarely go on leaves.

    I know the policy was to avoid employees taking advantage of sick leave for extended vacation, which unfortunately punishes even those who does not do it.

    Anyway, I hope I feel better otherwise I have to go to work sick.

    Until my next letter, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you.

                                                                                                   Daddy

Not again

Dear Mama,

    Remember I told you in a previous letter that Angel was supposed to be starting on her new job this week? It was supposed to be today, actually. Guess what, Mama? She wasn't called. Today was supposed to be her orientation but nobody was calling her. When she called to confirm, they said they would not push through in hiring her, and never even gave any reason. They already asked her to submit pre-employment requirements, Mama. Why are they doing this to us?

    If feels like I'm going back to the gutter, Mama. I don't want to go there anymore. Everything seems to be falling apart. I feel like a total failure, Mama.

    Help me, Mama. Hold my hands.

                                                                                                        Daddy

 

New year

Dear Mama,

    I know it's just the second half of the year, but it's a new year for me because of 2 things. First, the Toastmaster year has ended last 30th of June, and also my term as Area Director. July 1st is the start of the new Toastmaster year. In my work, it is also a new year because Australia follows fiscal year that ends in June 30. So, we are also in a new year at work, and quite busy at the end of year works.

    There is also a 3rd reason, Mama. Angel will be starting a new job this month. She was supposed to start on Friday but it was moved to next Friday. Anyway, it's just a week delay, Mama. Hopefully, she'll stay longer in this new job of her.

    Well, that's all I really wanted to say, Mama. Aside from those things, there are really nothing new. I still have the anxieties every time evening comes because I am not sure if it will be a peaceful night for us here at home.

    Ralph and Edgar are still in their same company. Everything's okay for them, Mama. Well, I mean everything's not always okay, but speaking generally, it is. You know what I mean, Mama.

    That will be all for now, Mama. Until my next letter.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

I did okay

Dear Mama,

    We had our Songwriter's Night yesterday and it was a longer set than what we used to have. We sang 5 songs instead of the usual 3 songs, Mama.

    I think I did okay, Mama. I had some bloopers on my chords but they weren't that much obvious, Mama. I was still nervous but my voice did not crack. I was able to sing with my full voice. I hope you are proud of me, Mama.

    I know I don't have a really beautiful voice, but at least the lyrics of my songs were meaningful. And I think my voice was at least tolerable. I still don't know if anything will come out of what I'm doing right now, but I did enjoy myself last night, Mama.

    Ralph is on his flight to Cebu right now. Edgar is cooking in the kitchen for our lunch. Angel is still sleeping.

    That's all I really wanted to say, Mama. That I did okay last night at the Songwriter's Night. I hope I made you proud.

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                Daddy

 

Saturday

Dear Mama,

    It's Saturday, 10 a.m. Edgar is having a webinar in his room right now. It's a CPD accredited webinar that he needs for his professional license renewal. Ralph is out now to meet his friends. He hasn't slept yet because he works on graveyard shift. After his work, he immediately prepared to go out. Angel is still sleeping now, she slept at around 5 a.m.

    I'm looking out the window and it's a bit gloomy. I don't know whether I should get the laundry I washed this morning, Mama. Earlier, there was a heavy rain but it has stopped at around 7 a.m. so I hanged my laundry outside. There's still sun but it's a bit cloudy, Mama. I guess I'll check and maybe get them and just hang them inside after I write my letter.

    I'll be having another gig tonight, Mama. I'll be singing 5 original songs. I hope my voice won't crack. I still don't know where I am getting this guts to allow myself to to perform in front of the crowd. Is there even a sense in what I'm doing? If you were with us now, do you think you'd be proud of what I'm doing, Mama?

    Anyway, I'll be preparing for our lunch in a while, Mama. Because Edgar is having a webinar, he won't be able to cook for our lunch. I was about to go out and buy some lutong ulam, but Edgar said we'll just open a canned tuna and have hard boiled eggs.

    That will be for now, Mama. Until my next letter. 

    I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

 

Father's Day and my visit to my doctor

Dear Mama,

    Yesterday was Father's Day. Ralph and Edgar rented a house for staycation. It was in Cuayan, Mama, and it had a pool. We went yesterday, spent the night, and came back home this afternoon.

    It was a great break, Mama. The pool was small, just enough for us to dip, but it was okay. We enjoyed our stay. We also had a beer each last night. Had a quick dip again this morning before we had our brunch, and then we prepared to go home. I enjoyed the gestures of our kids, Mama.

    This afternoon, I went to my doctor for my quarterly check up. I brought the results of my blood chem test last week. My cholesterol spiked, so he brought back my maintenance medicine which he took last quarter. He changed the brand because the last brand he gave was causing my SGPT to go up, whatever that is. This quarter, without that medicine, my SGPT  went down, but my cholesterol went up.

    The other medicines also continue - for uric acid and BP.

    Anyway, Edgar said we're going to have our dinner now. Until my next letter, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                                        Daddy

Update on Angel

Dear Mama,

    It's 7:57 p.m., and Angel is on her way home now. She's applying for jobs, Mama. I think she went to at least 3 companies today, all BPOs. 

    She and Edgar decided to stop their fishball and streetfood cart business. They realized the work and time they put to it are not worth the sales they are getting. And I agree with them, Mama. And it also affected all our schedules. At least Angel has tried her hands on business. She was good at it actually, Mama. She has management skills. She just need to discipline herself regarding her time management.

    We have already taken our dinner. We just saved some food for Angel so she can eat once she got home.

    I had my blood extraction again earlier, Mama for my quarterly laboratory test and consultation. I will get the results on Saturday. I hope they are favorable. Next week, I'll schedule my visit to my doctor.

    A bit of good news, Area G3, the Area I am handling as an Area Director is a President Distinguished Area for this year, Mama. It is the highest rate they can give to a club, area, or division. I am happy that we got this rating in my term, although I am not necessarily proud because the catalyst was the new club, of which I had no involvement on.

    Anyway, we got and I am happy for my clubs. Because they share this prestige with me. It is actually because of their hard work why we got the rating. It was all on them, all I did was to remind of what to do.

    I hope you're still proud of me, Mama.

    Angel is already home. She's now feeding the cats.

    Until my next letter, Mama. I miss you.

    I love you.

                                                                                            Daddy  

Sometimes I don't know

Dear Mama,

    It's Saturday, I been sitting here for almost an hour trying to think of what to write. It's 2:20 p.m., Edgar left to attend a birthday party with his officemates earlier, after we had a lunch. Ralph is sleeping now, as you know he's working night shift. Although he had lunch with us earlier. Angel is just resting right now, she won't be selling fishball and other streetfoods today. They took Saturday and Sunday as their rest day.

    I went to Bataan yesterday after work, Mama. I was with my fellow Toastmasters from Area G3. We attended the open house meeting our club there, the Bataan Toastmasters Club. I gave a talk about impromptu speaking, Mama. It was okay, not as excellent as I expected it to be. But it was okay. Next week I'll be giving another talk in my club, Cabalen San Fernandino Toastmasters Club, and this time it will be about being funny. I still have not prepared yet. I have a rough draft, and it's not organized. I hope I can do it this weekend.

    My fellow Toastmasters are egging me to go with them to Cebu next month, Mama. The kids say I should. But while I admit I wanted to, I am not sure if I can afford it. You know I am depleted financially, Mama and I am barely making ends meet. I could ask from our children, but I don't want to do that, Mama. 

    I don't know anymore, Mama. I hope things get better so petty things like this won't be too hard to decide.

    I wish you were here. I miss you, Mama.

    I love you.

                                                                                            Daddy 

June 1st

Dear Mama,

    It's the first day of June. We're almost done with the second half of the year. We did not sell fishball today, Mama. Saturday and Sunday is the day off of Angel (and I) in selling fish ball and other street foods. 

    Edgar's not here tonight, Mama. He is with his officemates for their summer outing. He'll be back tomorrow. Tomorrow, it will be Ralph who will going to his company outing and team building. He'll be back on Tuesday. 

    I feel sleepy right now, Mama. But I still need to do a lot of things. I need to prepare for my talk on Friday in Bataan. I need to prepare my slides. I also need to prepare for my talk in Cabalen on the 15th of June, and then for my gig on the 22nd for the Songwriters' Night.

    I'll probably do it tomorrow, Mama. I am tired right now.

    Until my next letter, Mama.

    I miss you.

    I love you, Mama.

                                                                                            Daddy

We got rained on

Dear Mama,

    Angel and I went to sell fish ball and other street foods yesterday. It was only the 2 of us because Ralph and Edgar went to Manila to attend the birthday of Dang Itang together with Nanay and their cousins and aunties in Sta. Teresita.

    It wasn't bad, even though there was a miscommunication with one customer who said she'll buy "10" which to our understanding was "10 sticks". She even added and said, "20 na po." So, Angel cooked 20 sticks of fish balls (200 pcs because there's 10 pcs per stick), only to say at the end that they were referring to pieces of fish balls and not stick. So, we ended up with so many cooked fish balls because they did not take them.

    And at around 7:30 p.m., the rain fell so, we had to pack up and go home. Good thing the 2 boys were already home by then and Edgar helped us.

    It wasn't such a bad sale, except for the rain and the fish balls which were not bought.

    I guess, Angel is learning from all this experiences, Mama.

    That will be all for now, Mama. Just sharing the experience we had last night.

    I miss you, Mama.

     I love you.

                                                                                                Daddy

Hong Kong trip :(

Dear Mama,

    My officemates are planning to go to Hong Kong this December. It will be a sort of Christmas party for us, Mama. You know how it is in the office, instead of having a party, since we're only few they opt to travel instead. This time, they are planning to go to Hong Kong.

    I know I'm duty bound to join because it's a sort of company activity. But it's too expensive, Mama. Our company will only shoulder our plane fare and accommodation. Everything we will spend there will be on us! Like food, travelling from one location to another, and other incidental expenses! I can't afford that, Mama!

    I have no savings. In fact I am almost financially depleted! I don't want to ask Ralph or Edgar for any subsidy because that would be unfair to them. How can I tell my officemates I can't go with them, Mama?

    Please help me!

                                                                                                            Daddy

Happy anniversary, Mama!

Dear Mama,

    We arrived home at around 7:30 to 8 p.m., our children and I. We went out to celebrate our anniversary, Mama. Ralph treated us to a steak dinner, because Angel has been wanting to eat steak for a long time now. It was a bit expensive, Mama and I'm getting worried and concerned about Ralph's spending.

    Anyway, as I've said we went to celebrate our anniversary, Mama. I still remember when you reluctantly said yes and agreed to be my girlfriend. Thank you for accepting me, Mama. Thank you for giving me a chance. Thank you for loving me.

    Happy anniversary, Mama!

    I miss you.

    I love you.

                                                                                                                Daddy